Scientists tell us that some activities are good for health and others are bad. Despite knowing that, millions of people still continue doing unhealthy activities. What are the causes and what are the solutions for this?
By
Change preposition
As
the
Correct article usage
apply
human
Fix the agreement mistake
humans
developing
, many harmful activities Replace the word
development
are
broadening Wrong verb form
have been
by
Change preposition
as
the
time Correct article usage
apply
passed
. Maybe some of them do not damage Wrong verb form
passes
peopleʼs
Correct your spelling
people's
health
much, however
, a few ones, such
as smoking, alcohol, drugs and sugary food consumption are affecting their healthy lifestyle perceptibly.
There are many causes which bring on not giving up these addictions. Namely, individuals
may not fully grasp the severity of health
risks or the cumulative impact of their actions. Moreover
, unhealthy activities like smoking, excessive consumption of junk food and physical inactivity often provide immediate pleasure or stress relief and create a sense of temporary satisfaction which outweighs concerns about potential health
issues in the distant future . Also
, the physiological cravings and psychological dependence make it challenging for individuals
to break free from these habits even though humans are aware of their negative impact on health
.
There are some solutions to tackle these problems. Firstly
, by increasing public awareness community
outreach programs, we can help Change preposition
of community
individuals
fully comprehend the health
risks associated with unhealthy behaviors. providing clear, evidence-based information we can empower people to make informed choices. Implementing public health
policies, regulations, and taxation measures that discourage unhealthy activities, such
as tobacco and alcohol consumption, can create a more supportive environment for healthy choices. Restricting marketing
of unhealthy products and promoting Correct article usage
the marketing
health
-conscious initiatives can influence population-wide behavior
change.
In conclusion, maybe Change the spelling
behaviour
individuals
can not give up these deleterious actions, but, if we will determine roots
of them and implement targeted solutions, it can be effective and supportive to fight against them.Correct article usage
the roots
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examples
To enhance the clarity of your examples, consider incorporating more specific instances or case studies that concretely illustrate the impact of unhealthy activities. This could further strengthen your argument and make your points more relatable for the reader.
evidence
Be mindful of avoiding generalized statements without supporting evidence. This can improve the credibility of your claims and make your essay more persuasive.
structure
You provided a clear and logically structured essay, effectively addressing the causes and solutions for unhealthy activities.
introduction & conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion were compelling, framing the topic effectively and summarizing the key points well. This bookends your argument effectively and reinforces your viewpoints.
comprehension
You successfully demonstrated a comprehensive understanding of the topic, offering insightful observations and constructive solutions.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite
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