Smoking is a major cause of serious illness and death throughout the world today. In the interest of the public health, governments should ban cigarettes and other tobacco products. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In recent times, many

people

Use synonyms

smoking and it is a

cause

Use synonyms

of different illnesses so governments should prohibit smoking or taking

tobacco

Use synonyms

. Nowadays, plenty of

people

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take

tobacco

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and

then

Linking Words

die and it is caused by smoking.

Nonetheless

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, many men

smoke

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. From my point of view, if the government want to healthy life, they must forbid smoking and say that

people

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who use

tobacco

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or smoking, we demand a large amount of money.

Then

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this

Linking Words

rule a lot of

people

Use synonyms

will not

smoke

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Moreover

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, a plethora of the population dies,

due to

Linking Words

they take

tobacco

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or smoking very much per day and about 8.6 million

people

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in the US have at least 1 serious illness

that is

Linking Words

caused by smoking.

Moreover

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, in 2012, 18.1% of Americans, 18 and older, were current smokers. A cigarette contains over 4800 chemicals 69 of which are known to

cause

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cancer. Secondhand,

smoke

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contains over 7000 chemicals, including 70 cancer-causing chemicals. So,I totally agree and if the government stem smoking, there are many useful sides for us.

For instance

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, the air will more clearer because cigarette

smoke

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is very bad for our health.

In addition

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Change preposition

apply

show examples

, those who

smoke

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cigarettes, his

lungs

Fix the agreement mistake

lung

show examples

are

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

cancer, and they

impact

Correct subject-verb agreement

impacts

show examples

to lungs, oesophagus and

livers

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liver

show examples

Further

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, it causes

cause

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emphysema and it is the

cause

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of complicating respire and other bad things.

Nevertheless

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, some men

smoke

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brazenly and it is the worst thing. Apart from that, we are Muslims and our faith is Islam in Islam faith smoking is one of the most harmful things. So, smoking does not have any merits, but smoking has many demerits for our health and environment.

To sum up

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, smoking is one of the worst things in the world and it has only bad ways in every way on

people

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's lives, air, animals and

another

Correct quantifier usage

other

show examples

healthy

thing

Fix the agreement mistake

things

show examples

. In that way, the government should ban smoking as it is the best way to healthy life.

Submitted by Shaxnoza on Wed Mar 20 2024

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Coherence and Cohesion

Make sure your essay has a clear structure with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Begin with a statement of your viewpoint, followed by paragraphs that support your position with arguments and examples, and conclude with a brief summary or a restatement of your viewpoint.

Task Achievement

Develop your ideas more fully. Each paragraph should contain one main idea or argument, supported by relevant examples or data. Avoid making general statements without providing specific evidence or examples to support them.

Coherence and Cohesion

Work on transitioning smoothly from one idea to the next. Use linking words and phrases effectively to guide the reader through your essay. Examples include 'furthermore', 'in addition', 'however', and 'therefore'. This will enhance the flow and readability of your essay.

Language

Review your essay for grammatical accuracy and range of vocabulary. Proper grammar and varied vocabulary can greatly contribute to the clarity and strength of your argument. Consider revising sentences that are unclear or repetitive.

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

The easiest way to score well on the IELTS Task 2 writing portion is to structure your writing in a solid essay format.

A strong argument essay structure can be split up into 4 paragraphs, each containing 4 sentences (except the conclusion paragraph, which only contains 3 sentences).

Stick to this essay structure:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction
Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

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11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

322 words

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Smoking is a major cause of serious illness and death throughout the world today. In the interest of the public health, governments should ban cigarettes and other tobacco products. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs

Some people say that the only way to get success is to go to universities. Others say that it depends on other factors. What is your opinion?

“In many countries, paying for things using mobile phone (cellphone) apps is becoming increasingly common.” Does this development have more advantages or more disadvantages? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s life To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that people in senior positions alone should make decisions in a business, while others think that employees should be involved in the decision-making process too. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.