IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5.5

the map below is of the town Galsdon. A new supermarket (s) is planned for the town. the map shows two possible sites for the supermarket. write at least 150 words.

the map below is of the town Galsdon. A new supermarket (s) is planned for the town. the map shows two possible sites for the supermarket. write at least 150 words.
#town #galsdon #supermarket #two #sites
The map shows us two possible sites for a new supermarket
for
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the
town
 of Galsdon.
Overall
, we can see that
railway
Correct article usage
the railway
show examples
 and main roads
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
 going to Hindon, Bransdon and Cransdon populations. The first potential location s1 is outside of the
town
 located
Change preposition
in
show examples
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
Correct article usage
the north-west
show examples
north-west
Correct article usage
the north-west
show examples
 which
named
Add a missing verb
is named
show examples
 Hindon with
Correct article usage
a 10,000
show examples
10,000
Correct article usage
a 10,000
show examples
population
. You can get there on a train. There
also
have
Verb problem
is
show examples
 a railway where you can reach
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
s2 and to the Cransdon supermarket it is
also
llocated
Correct your spelling
located
 outside.
Moreover
, it is very convenient
to
Change preposition
for
show examples
 people to get to
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Cransdon there
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
 a huge amount of
population
. It is near to
Town
Correct article usage
the Town
show examples
 Centre. If you
will
Verb problem
go
show examples
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
Town
 centre you can travel to
Bransdon
Correct article usage
the Bransdon
show examples
population
with
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
15,000
Add a missing verb
is 15,000
show examples
population
 and
a distances
Correct the article-noun agreement
a distance
distances
show examples
16
Change preposition
of 16
show examples
 km. 
In contrast
, the
Town
 centre
no
Add a missing verb
has no
show examples
 traffic zones and it would be difficult to find
car
Correct article usage
a car
show examples
 parking zone. You must
to
Verb problem
apply
show examples
traver
Correct your spelling
travel
 by train and spend money on it.
Submitted by bekzhan.akynbekov on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
▼
Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 67%.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words town, population with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "shows" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: