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Writing Samples
Band 7

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the expenditure on three categories among different age groups of residents in the UK in 2004. Summaries the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#expenditure #three #categories #age #groups #residents #uk #summaries #information #features #comparisons
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The bar graph illustrates the total spending on living aspects by various
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 of inhabitants in the UK, specifically in 2004.
Overall
Linking Words
,
it is clear that
Linking Words
 the highest
expenditure
Use synonyms
 was on food and drink
in addition
Linking Words
 to entertainment, compared to the lowest
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on restaurants and hotels. Regarding the
expenditure
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
on
show examples
 food and drink, it was high in the three
groups
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
aged
show examples
age
Use synonyms
 from 46 to 76
years
Use synonyms
 by around 16% to 24%.
In contrast
Linking Words
,for the
age
Use synonyms
 group under 30
years
Use synonyms
 old, it was only 6%.
Although
Linking Words
 the
expenditure
Use synonyms
 on restaurants and hotels varies between the different
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
, it reaches its peak in the group under 30
years
Use synonyms
 old by around 14% compared to people aged 61 to 75
years
Use synonyms
 old, who spend less than 5%.
Moreover
Linking Words
,
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
entertainment spending,
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is considered the highest in 61 to 75
years
Use synonyms
by
Change preposition
apply
show examples
approximately 24%, followed by 46 to 60
years
Use synonyms
 by spending about 14%.
Smillarly
Correct your spelling
Similarly
, both
age
Use synonyms
groups
Use synonyms
 under 30 to 45
years
Use synonyms
 old spend the least by around 6%.
Submitted by jumanh114 on

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Vocabulary: Replace the words age, groups, expenditure, years with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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