An increase in the production of consumer goods results in damage to the natural environment.Why is this the caseand what solutions are possible?
Nowadays consumer goods demand
are
drastically increasing, Change the verb form
is
as
a result, it is Correct word choice
and as
inversly
Correct your spelling
inversely
effects
the environment. Correct your spelling
affecting
This
essay will delve into the possible causes and put forward some practical solutions to address this
issue.
First and foremost, one of the major causes of the damage of natural
is the overutilization of Replace the word
nature
natrual
resources for the Correct your spelling
natural
production
of cosumer
goods. To exemplify, it is believed that one million trees are Correct your spelling
consumer
Wrong verb form
cut
cutting
every month for the Wrong verb form
cut
production
of paper around the globe. Besides
, with the invent
of information technology, usage of Replace the word
invention
low quality
electronic devices Add a hyphen
low-quality
are
increased, Verb problem
has
as a result
, immense
amount of e-waste Correct article usage
an immense
are
generated which is detrimental Correct subject-verb agreement
is
for
Change preposition
to
the
nature. Correct article usage
apply
Moreover
, private transport vehicle production
demand at
Add a missing verb
is at
Correct pronoun usage
its
the
peak Change the word
its
due to
the population surge, as a result
, carbon Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
emission
Fix the agreement mistake
emissions
on
the Add a missing verb
are on
increase
more than ever before.
Replace the word
increasing
Nevertheless
, although
increasing production
of the
consumer products Correct article usage
apply
are
detrimental Change the verb form
is
for
the environment, there are some feasible Change preposition
to
solution
to address Fix the agreement mistake
solutions
this
issue to a great extend
. Replace the word
extent
Firstly
, promoting paper less
documents and books is a practical solution to save trees. To illustrate, Correct your spelling
paperless
usage
of electronic invoices Correct article usage
the usage
are
significantly Unnecessary verb
apply
decline
Correct subject-verb agreement
declines
the
paper consumption in many business organisations. Correct article usage
apply
Secondly
, electronic devices
Fix the agreement mistake
device
production
should be controlled by the government by implementing strict regulations. Long lasting
electronic products should be Add a hyphen
Long-lasting
promtoed
and Correct your spelling
promoted
low quality
e-devices should be banned. By doing Add a hyphen
low-quality
this
e-waste can be significantly reduced.
In conclusion, overutilization of natural resources for production
of consumer goods and e-waste can Add an article
the production
be negatively
Change the verb form
negatively effect
effect
the natural balance. Promotion of Correct your spelling
affect
long lasting
Add a hyphen
long-lasting
robustic
quality electronic devices would be a practical solution to address Correct your spelling
robust
this
issue.Submitted by ck.manshad on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
To improve task response, ensure that you fully respond to all parts of the question. Your essay should clearly explain the reasons behind the environmental damage caused by increased production of consumer goods and propose specific, detailed solutions. While you have addressed both components, adding more detailed examples and elaborating on how each solution can effectively address the issue will enhance your score.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, focus on structuring your essay more clearly. Use a variety of linking words and phrases to connect ideas smoothly. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea, supported by relevant examples or explanations. Additionally, work on paragraphing, ensuring there is a clear distinction between your introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion. Introducing bullet points or numbered lists for solutions or causes could also enhance readability.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example