Some employers offer their employees subsidized membership of gyms and sport clubs,believing that this will make their staff healthier and thus more effective at work.Other employees see no benifit in doing so.

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It has been known that investing in

Use synonyms

employees

Change noun form

employees'

employee's

show examples

health is

beneficials

Correct your spelling

beneficial

boost

Wrong verb form

boosting

show examples

productivity

Add an article

the productivity

show examples

of work. I believe companies

tar

Correct your spelling

that

show examples

do not support paying for

spots

Fix the agreement mistake

spot

show examples

clubs are investing in major aspects.

Whereas

Linking Words

, others, find it progressively important to combine working out within

word

Correct article usage

a word

show examples

environment. I will endeavour to discuss it

further

Linking Words

and provide a conclusion

at the end

Linking Words

. One side of the argument,

think

Correct subject-verb agreement

thinks

show examples

that the level of productivity required from the staff members must come from the daily life of a person in the first place. What I mean by that, is the institution is paying salaries and

in addition

Linking Words

some reasonable

bonus

Fix the agreement mistake

bonuses

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and achieving allowances to outstanding

employees

Use synonyms

Instead

Linking Words

, leaders can offer a challenge to invite all staff to go to the gymnasium,

for example

Linking Words

. Based on scientific evidence

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

a study has been conducted at Harvard University that

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

very few numbers of

employees

Use synonyms

admitted that

this

Linking Words

physical exercise policy is unreasonable and they take leave on that day.

As a

Linking Words

result

Add a comma

result,

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there are many positive activities to boos the motivation in workplace,

such

Linking Words

bonus

Fix the agreement mistake

bonuses

show examples

, rewards,

Correct word choice

and a

show examples

relocation trip could deliver

the

Correct article usage

show examples

positive effect.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, I stand

Change preposition

show examples

Linking Words

this

Correct determiner usage

the

show examples

point of view that applying

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

activities is fundamental

Change preposition

show examples

workplace

Add an article

the workplace

show examples

. To illustrate more,

this

Linking Words

has

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

been approved by scientific research for the

last

Linking Words

few decades, that companies that implement clubs and sports memberships are producing more and the level of competition is peaking yearly.

For instance

Linking Words

, in China and

Japan

Add a comma

Japan,

show examples

the governments

allowing

Wrong verb form

allow

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

employees

Use synonyms

to practice exercise during

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

working hours and there is

medical

Correct article usage

a medical

show examples

checkup every month, where the results were 92% no illness among the staff

this

Linking Words

is extremely satisfying. The idea is to maintain the

sport

Fix the agreement mistake

sports

show examples

spirit and have fun activities to motivate the members to stay fit and

remain

Verb problem

maintain

show examples

a healthy lifestyle

while

Linking Words

working

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

full time

Add a hyphen

full-time

show examples

. In conclusion, investing in sports and health is priceless and quite beneficial for

human

Fix the agreement mistake

humans

show examples

workforce

Add an article

the workforce

show examples

and in daily life.

sahrrsmTue Mar 26 2024

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Task Achievement

To enhance your essay's Task Achievement, ensure you fully address the question prompt. This means explaining both sides of the argument and your own opinion thoroughly. Using more varied and detailed examples can help to strengthen your points and make your essay more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion

For Coherence and Cohesion, work on organizing your essay more logically. This includes having a clear introduction that outlines the discussion, followed by body paragraphs that each focus on a single main idea, and a conclusion that summarizes your points. Use cohesive devices (e.g., Furthermore, However, In conclusion) appropriately to link ideas and paragraphs.

Language

Improving the variety and accuracy of your language use can also enhance your essay. This involves using a range of vocabulary and sentence structures accurately. Avoid repetition and try to use synonyms where possible. Pay attention to grammatical correctness and punctuation.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
34
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

330 words

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Some employers offer their employees subsidized membership of gyms and sport clubs,believing that this will make their staff healthier and thus more effective at work.Other employees see no benifit in doing so.

Your opinion

You are interested in applying for a job advertised in a local newspaper. Write a letter to the hiring manager expressing your interest and outlining your qualifications and experience.

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in order to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Many different countries have the same shops and products. Some think that it is a positive development, whereas others consider it as negative. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people think that cars are the best way to travel in a city, while others think that bicycle is better. Discuss both points of view and give your opinion.