The diagram below shows how glass is recycled. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words.

The diagram below shows how glass is recycled.

 Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

You should write at least 150 words.
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The diagram illustrates the way of recycling glass. In short, there are several steps from collecting
bins
Use synonyms
to renewing and
finally
Linking Words
that
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
will be used as
bins
Use synonyms
again.
To begin
Linking Words
with, people should trash glass
bins
Use synonyms
to certain places to recycle them. After that, the
bins
Use synonyms
are transported to the treatment plant by track. At the treatment plant, they are put into a washing and sterilising machine
Linking Words
firstly
Change the word
first
show examples
, where they can be completely clean. Surprisingly, the cleaned
bins
Use synonyms
are not reused as bottles as they are after cleaning. It is crushed and melted in a machine at the next step. Following that, the
melt
Replace the word
melted
show examples
glass is poured into a mold machine and
took
Wrong verb form
takes
show examples
some time to be solid perfectly. At
this
Linking Words
stage, they are remolded as
bins
Use synonyms
again, and
after
Linking Words
this
Linking Words
, they
Linking Words
finally
Add a missing verb
are finally
show examples
ready to ship
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
supermarkets and will be used as bottles which
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
container
Fix the agreement mistake
containers
show examples
of various drinks again.
Submitted by mayu1022.p on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "finally".
Conclusion: The conclusion is too long.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Basic structure: Add more body paragraphs.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
Basic structure: Write more paragraphs.
Vocabulary: Replace the words bins with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 2 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • diagram
  • recycled
  • stages
  • collection
  • waste glass
  • sources
  • bottles
  • jars
  • windows
  • transported
  • recycling facility
  • sorted
  • color
  • processes
  • cleaned
  • impurities
  • labels
  • caps
  • crushed
  • cullet
  • raw material
  • melted
  • furnace
  • temperature
  • molded
  • new glass products
  • distribution
  • consumers
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