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Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The chart below shows the preferred method of communication for 18–30 years old in three different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the preferred method of communication for 18–30 years old in three different years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
#method #communication #years #three #summarise #information #features #comparisons
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The line graph
illustrate
Change the verb form
illustrates
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 the best method connection for 18 to 30 years old from 1998 to 2006.
Overall
Linking Words
, the rates of
cmost ommunication techniqes
Correct your spelling
most communication techniques
 witnessed a steady over the period,
while
Linking Words
 cellular
phone
Fix the agreement mistake
phones
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 exhibit
upward
Correct article usage
an upward
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 trend throughout the years. Turning to details, Cell phones
shown
Add the auxiliary verb
showed
have shown
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gradual
Add an article
a gradual
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 increase from 0% in 1996 to 60% in 2006.
This
Linking Words
 proportion was the highest result compared with other countries. In the meantime, the
perecentage
Correct your spelling
percentage
 of
linkdine
Correct your spelling
LinkedIn
 remained stable from 1996 to 2006,
while
Linking Words
Add an article
the internet
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internet
Capitalize word
Internet
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 was steady until 2004 it
climb
Wrong verb form
climbed
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 to 20%. Moving on the probability of mobile and Food services,
were
Correct subject-verb agreement
was
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 0% from 1996 to 2002,
Afterthat
Correct your spelling
After that
in
Change preposition
apply
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2004 it slightly
increase
Wrong verb form
increased
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 and
rech
Correct your spelling
reached
 less than 10%
in
Change the preposition
at
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 the end of
period
Add an article
the period
show examples
.
Submitted by wjdan.areeshi on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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