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Band 6

The graphs show figures relating to hours worked and stress levels amongst professionals in eight groups. Describe the information shown to a university or collage lecturer.

The graphs show figures relating to hours worked and stress levels amongst professionals in eight groups. Describe the information shown to a university or collage lecturer.
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The provided graphs illustrate figures about 8 different types of careers, including writers, doctors, chefs, lecturers, lawyers, movie producers, programmers, and businessmen. The bar chart depicts the average amount of
hours
Use synonyms
 worked per week and the pie chart shows in percentage how many people in each occupation suffering from
stress
Use synonyms
 and present illnesses related.
Overall
Linking Words
, there does not seem a correlation between high rates of
hours
Use synonyms
 worked and illness caused by
stress
Use synonyms
. The occupation groups who work more are businessmen (70
hours
Use synonyms
), movie producers (60
hours
Use synonyms
), and doctors (about 52
hours
Use synonyms
),
whereas
Linking Words
 the occupation groups who suffer more from pressure at work are lecturers (25%), film producers (18%), and physicians (15%). The less frequent groups who struggle with
stress
Use synonyms
 are software developers (5%), authors (8%), and lawyers (8%),
while
Linking Words
 less frequent clusters on working
hours
Use synonyms
 per week are teachers, cooks, and advocates. Actually, lecturers have the lowest
hours
Use synonyms
 of work per 7 days and surprisingly they have the highest level of diseases from
stress
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by fmulato on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fifth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words hours, stress with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "chart" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fifth paragraph.
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