Robots and artificial intelligent are being developed to replace humans in the workplace. Why is this happening? Do you think this will have a positive or negative impact on society?
Robots and artificial intelligence, or AI, are being applied as an alternative to human
employees
in the workplace. This
method is used to satisfy the increasing demand of global industry and it can trigger large-scale unemployment as well as
the high risk of insecurity.
To begin
with, it is undeniable that the worldwide industry is growing rapidly over the years. The leaders of the firm corporations want to earn as much profit as possible and the best way is upgrade
the quality and efficiency of their Change the verb form
to upgrade
upgrading
workers
. Unfortunately, hiring new and competent employees
will waste a lot of time and they can not force their workers
to 24/7. Meanwhile, applying robots and computer programs can save a significant amount of time and money and these employees
can work tirelessly, quickly and more effectively than their human counterparts. For these reasons, big companies around the world are likely to hire robots and artificial intelligence in order to boost their revenue as well as
providing
themWrong verb form
provide
a
stable status within the global field.
Add the preposition
with a
On the other hand
, however
, it should be recognised that these methods can increase the discrimination among the societies and also
the risk of being attacked. Replacing human workers
with robotic ones will lead to large-scale unemployment, nobody has a job which means that they can not earn money for their daily activities. This
predicament will create an extremely unfair society where the rich are living a happy life and the poor are dying on the streets. It is also
be considered that even though the work of computers is visually good but
it contains a lot of mistakes and these Correct word choice
apply
workers
are vulnerable to hackers. Consequently
, corporations still human employees
for management and security.
In conclusion, human workers
are slow but clever and robotic workers
are effective but fragile to attacks. This
writer believes that they have to cooperate with each other so that the workplace is financially safe and secured
.Wrong verb form
secure
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Task Achievement
Make sure to present examples that are specific and directly relate to the points being made for more impactful arguments.
Coherence & Cohesion
Consider varying sentence structures and using transitional phrases to enhance flow and readability.
General
Proofread the essay to ensure clarity and catch minor grammatical errors.
Task Achievement
Successfully addressed both parts of the prompt, providing a clear opinion on the impact of robots and AI in the workplace.
Coherence & Cohesion
Good job on structuring the essay with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
Task Achievement
Demonstrated a good understanding of the topic and presented well-supported points.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
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