The pie charts show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in new zealand in 2003 and 2013.

#show #sales #sectors #zealand

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The

given

Verb problem

apply

show examples

pie charts

demonstrates

Change the verb form

demonstrate

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Change preposition

apply

show examples

the

internet

Capitalize word

Internet

show examples

shopping

sales

Use synonyms

for retail sectors from 2003 to 2013 in New Zealand.

Overall

Linking Words

, the

percentage

Use synonyms

of travel

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

the highest

sales

Use synonyms

through online shopping in 2003,

while

Linking Words

after a decade film or music became the top

most

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

online shopping

sales

Use synonyms

To begin

Linking Words

with, clothes have 24% online

sales

Use synonyms

. which is approximately one-fourth of a

quater

Correct your spelling

quarter

in 2003, which dropped down to 16% after a span of 10 years.

Furthermore

Linking Words

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the net shopping

sales

Use synonyms

for books

Wrong verb form

were

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the

least

Correct word choice

lowest

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in 2003

Change preposition

show examples

19%,

while

Linking Words

the proportion slightly

increases

Wrong verb form

increased

show examples

to 22% by the year 2013. Apart from these, online

sales

Use synonyms

of travel held the

top most

Correct your spelling

topmost

show examples

position

Correct your spelling

show examples

retail areas with a

percentage

Use synonyms

of 36% in 2003,

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

however,

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it's

Correct your spelling

its

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proportion

decreases

Wrong verb form

decreased

show examples

signifuantely

Correct your spelling

significantly

by 29%

at the end

Linking Words

Add an article

the giver

a giver

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giver

Replace the word

given

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time period.

Lastly

Linking Words

, internet

sales

Use synonyms

of film and music

Wrong verb form

were

show examples

not popular in 2003

Change preposition

show examples

21%

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

the

percentage

Use synonyms

sales

Use synonyms

whereas

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

number

rises up

Wrong verb form

rose

show examples

in 2013

with

Change preposition

show examples

percentage

Use synonyms

Change preposition

apply

show examples

33% and

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

becomes

Wrong verb form

became

show examples

the highest online shopping

sales

Use synonyms

in the following year.

Submitted by akshayashvi07 on Wed Apr 03 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

▼

Introduction: The introduction is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words sales, percentage with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "undefined" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 4 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.

▼

9
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
28
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

181 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Comparative analysis
E-commerce
Retail sectors
Growth rate
Decade
Decline
Trends
Online transactions
Consumer behavior
Market share
Significant increase/decrease
Digital era
Accessibility
User-friendly platform
Market dynamics
Predictive outlook

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The pie charts show the online shopping sales for retail sectors in new zealand in 2003 and 2013.

Some people believe that in order to give opportunities to new generations, companies should encourage high level employees who are older than 55 to retire.Do you agree or disagree?

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

The animal species are becoming extinct due to human activities on laand and in sea l.What are the reasons and solutions?

the advantages and disadvantages of technology in education

Some people think that children should start school at a very early age, but others believe that chilren should go to school until they are older. Discuss both views and give your opinion.