IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6

The diagrams below show two hostel rooms that can be occupied by several people. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.

The diagrams below show two hostel rooms that can be occupied by several people. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparison where relevant.
#diagrams #show #two #hostel #rooms #people #summarise #information #features #comparison
The
two
 given diagrams describe
two
 types of hostel rooms which specific numbers of
people
 can
use
.
Overall
, it is clearly seen that
maximum
Correct article usage
a maximum
show examples
two
Change preposition
of two
show examples
people
 can
use
 the
room
 of
type
 A
with
Change preposition
for
show examples
 $50 per night.
In contrast
,
type
Correct article usage
a type
show examples
B
room
 can be occupied by four
people
, which can accept more
people
 than
type
Correct article usage
a type
show examples
 A
room
, with $90 per night. As
type
B
 can accept
two
people
 more than
type
 A
room
, it is shown that
type
B
room
 costs $40/per night more than
type
 A
room
. In detail,
type
Correct article usage
a type
show examples
 A
room
 has
two
 single beds
which
Change preposition
on which
show examples
two
people
 can sleep. Next to single beds,
small
Correct article usage
a small
show examples
 closet and
bathroom
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 placed. At the margin of the top right, there is a sink
so
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
that visitors can
use
 as a kitchen. As soon as entering the
type
 A
room
, visitors are able to
use
stairs
Correct article usage
the stairs
show examples
 on the right. Turning to
type
Correct article usage
the type
show examples
B
room
, there
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 more
furnitures
Change the wording
furniture
types of furniture
pieces of furniture
items of furniture
show examples
 than
type
Change preposition
in type
show examples
 A
room
such
 as
sofa
Change the article
a sofa
show examples
, TV, table in the middle of the
room
 and refrigerator at the margin of the top left, respectively. As soon as entering the
room
,
sink
Add an article
the sink
show examples
 is placed in the straight and there is
bathroom
Add an article
a bathroom
the bathroom
show examples
 on the right. There is a closet between
bathroom
Add an article
the bathroom
show examples
 and
two
 bunk beds which 4 customers can sleep. There is a
bathroom
 next to bookshelves, which
type
 A
room
 does not have.
Submitted by dmdql2708 on

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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words two, people, use, room, type, b, bathroom with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
▼

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