The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

#diagrams #show #changes #place #west #park #school #construction #summarise #information #features #comparisons

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

The diagrams illustrate the changes West Park Secondary

school

Capitalize word

School

show examples

has

transformed

Verb problem

undergone

show examples

over

duration

Add an article

the duration

a duration

show examples

of 60 years since it is

establishment

Add an article

an establishment

the establishment

show examples

in 1950.

Although

Linking Words

majority

Correct article usage

the majority

show examples

pieces

Change preposition

of pieces

show examples

have changed since 1950, the school has remained the same.

Also

Linking Words

playground

Correct article usage

the playground

show examples

has

Verb problem

show examples

invariable. It is forecast that the playground should be a friendly environment for the children.

Linking Words

Likewise

Add a comma

Likewise,

show examples

the main school building has not changed at all. By 1980,

major

Add an article

a major

the major

show examples

change

has take

Wrong verb form

had taken

show examples

place, replacing the houses with car

park

Fix the agreement mistake

parks

show examples

and science

block

Fix the agreement mistake

blocks

show examples

This

Linking Words

is related to providing students with

course related

Add a hyphen

course-related

show examples

facilities.

Linking Words

Also

Add a comma

Also,

show examples

the replacement of farmland

Change preposition

with

show examples

sports

field

Fix the agreement mistake

fields

show examples

due to

Linking Words

changes in society and time,

either

Correct word choice

and

show examples

it is

cause

Add an article

the cause

a cause

show examples

of the decrease of

agriculture

Replace the word

agricultural

show examples

enterprise in 30 years. In 2010, the sports field and playground space

decrease

Wrong verb form

decreased

show examples

. Presumably,

this

Linking Words

due to

Linking Words

population growth and car ownership.

In addition

Linking Words

Change preposition

apply

show examples

it is

realated

Correct your spelling

to the fact that people are less active and sporty,

children

Correct word choice

and children

show examples

prefer to stay

indoor

Correct your spelling

indoors

show examples

instead

Linking Words

of playing outside.

Submitted by buyabuya201 on Sun Apr 07 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also, due to".

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 5 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "decrease" was used 2 times.

▼

7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
25
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

162 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

Topic Vocabulary:

renovation
expansion
modernization
infrastructure
landscape
facade
demolition
construction
alteration
amenities
accessibility
sustainability
curriculum
enrollment
pedagogy
architecture
commute
heritage preservation

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

7
band
These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? #fathers #home #care
Nowadays, the shifting of the parents's roles trend increased significantly, as the mother bears the greater burden of responsibility including financial support,while the father takes on the housewife's tasks .
5
band
You and your family are planning to spend a weekend at a seaside hotel. Write a letter to the hotel, making the arrangements. In your letter tell them when you will be arriving and leaving explain what type of rooms you would like, and ask how much the weekend will cost ask about activities and places of interest near the hotel
I am writing this letter to schedule a booking for five adults at hotel Seaview for the next weekend.
7
band
Many students today may study abroad for a part or for all of their course. Although studying abroad has many benefits for the individual student, it also has a number of disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?
These days, plenty of pupils want to study in foreign countries, and the majority of them think studying in different countries has pros and cons. However, in this essay, I will discuss both advantages and drawbacks and draw some conclusions.
4.5
band
Nowadays, more and more people choose to do their shopping onlineinstead of going to physical stores. Why is this so? What are the disadvantages of this trend?
Today many people tend to buy their essentials via online instead of visiting physical shops. I belive that this trend mainly because they have no spare time due to the complicated lifestyle and working conditions. It can be found that drawbacks of this trend are the increasing number of defect products and rising online frauds.
<4
band
The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extend do you disagree or disagree with this statement?
To embark on, science can make our life more straightforward in communication and working which is obvious, if you compare (compare to) past era and these days. A good example of it would be, that we are used to using mobile and laptop to communicate remotely which was not (didn’t) available former (in the past) and teachings and businesses can be done without in the flesh (remotely). Moreover, the more science break throw( goes forward) the artificial intelligence will be more advance rather than it used to be which causes many of works can be done without human intervention which can also reduce human error.

The diagrams below show the changes that have taken place at West Park Secondary School since its construction in 1950. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

These days more fathers stay at home and take care of their children while mothers go out to work. What could be the reasons for this? Do you think it is a positive or a negative development? #fathers #home #care

Many students today may study abroad for a part or for all of their course. Although studying abroad has many benefits for the individual student, it also has a number of disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this?

Nowadays, more and more people choose to do their shopping onlineinstead of going to physical stores. Why is this so? What are the disadvantages of this trend?

The most important aim of science should be to improve people’s lives. To what extend do you disagree or disagree with this statement?