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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people claim that workers should wear uniforms. Others allege that people should be free in their choice. Discuss both opinions, and give your own opinion.

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Some
people
Use synonyms
 claim that
workers
Use synonyms
 should wear
uniforms
Use synonyms
. Others allege that
people
Use synonyms
 should be free in their choice. Nowadays, many
people
Use synonyms
 claim that
workers
Use synonyms
 should wear
uniforms
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. Certainly,
this
Linking Words
 good idea. If
workers
Use synonyms
 wear
uniforms
Use synonyms
, they will feel comfortable
as well as
Linking Words
 different other
workers
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 and
people
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.
In other words
Linking Words
, they stand out from the rest.
For instance
Linking Words
, doctors, teachers, police, firefighters, waiters and lots more. Doctors have to
uniforms
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. Because they take care of patients and must follow hygiene. Other
people
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 say that they don't have to wear a
uniform
Use synonyms
. To tell the truth,
workers
Use synonyms
 shouldn't wear
uniforms
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. They should wear whatever clothes they want. because when they wear the clothes they like, they feel free and comfortable.
for example
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, teacher, salesman and similar professions. The question
also
Linking Words
 arises as to why the teacher should not wear a
uniform
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. if the teacher is older, he may feel uncomfortable and not be able to explain the lesson well. In conclusion, in my view not all professions require a
uniform
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. because there are professions that require a
uniform
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 and those that do not.
For example
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, it requires a
uniform
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 from a doctor and a fireman.
Seller
Fix the agreement mistake
Sellers
show examples
 and coaches are not required to wear
uniforms
Use synonyms
.

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Structure
Try to maintain a clear structure throughout the essay. Start with an introduction that presents the topic and your thesis statement. Develop each argument in separate paragraphs with clear topic sentences.
Flow
Ensure each paragraph flows logically to the next. Use transitional phrases to help guide the reader through your argument.
Examples
Support your main points with specific examples or reasons. This adds weight to your arguments and demonstrates a deeper understanding of the topic.
Language Use
Work on varying your sentence structure and using a range of vocabulary to make your writing more engaging and to accurately convey your ideas.
Conclusion
Revisit the conclusion to ensure it effectively summarizes the essay's main arguments and clearly states your opinion.
Balanced discussion
You've effectively discussed both sides of the argument.
Effective conclusion
Your conclusion provides a clear summary of your own opinion, reinforcing the essay's main points.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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