The pie charts below compare water usage in San Diego, California and the rest of the world

#water #usage #san #diego #california #rest #world

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Overall

Linking Words

it is clear that

Linking Words

Correct article usage

apply

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substantially more amount of

water

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is consumed for Residential purposes in the 2 United States provinces than the world average.

In contrast

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, Unlike the United States of America, most of the

water

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is used in Archiculture around the world. Regarding

water

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usage for

Agriculutural

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agricultural

matters,

near two third

Correct your spelling

nearly two-thirds

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of the

water

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sources are spent in

this

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field,

while

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this

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figure stands as only 17%

qnd

Correct your spelling

and

28% in San Diego and California respectively. In terms of Residential and Industry categories, San Diego and California consume 60% of their

water

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in the former section,

while

Linking Words

for

the

Correct article usage

apply

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Worldwide

this

Linking Words

rate is only 8%. San Diego is the same as

world

Correct article usage

the world

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average in terms of

water

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used Industry( 23

percent

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per cent

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) and California's rate is 10

percent

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per cent

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higher than

those

Correct determiner usage

that

show examples

Submitted by soroush.nezami on Sat Apr 13 2024

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.

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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.

Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.

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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words water with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.

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5
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
9
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

3 paragraphs

132 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

proportion
households
significant
industrial use
implications
agriculture
geographical
climatic
economic factors
patterns
sustainability
practices
surprising
exceptionally
improvements

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The pie charts below compare water usage in San Diego, California and the rest of the world

Some people believe that reading stories form a book is better than watching tv or playing computer games for children to what extent do you agree or disagree.

These days it is much easier for many people to travel to different countries for tourism than in the past. Discuss both views and give reasons.

In many countries, teenagers are encouraged to find part-time jobs. Some individuals this is a good development while others disagree. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.