TRAFFIC AND ACCOMMODATION PROBLEMS ARE INCREASING, AND THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD ENCOURAGE BUSINESS TO MOVE FROM CITIES TO RURAL AREAS. DO THE ADVANTAGES OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGE?

#traffic #accommodation #government #business #move #cities #areas

In the modern world, more and more

people

choose to move into

cities

, which actually causes escalated

problems

involved with traffic and accommodation in urban

areas

. some believe that the government should facilitate

businesses

to change their locations from

cities

to countryside. From my perspective, I think the advantages will be better than the disadvantages in the future.

To begin

with, there is one main reason that

people

think the government should encourage

businesses

to relocate to rural

areas

which comes from being able to tackle the existing

problems

. Nowadays, citizens living in

cities

usually struggle with jammed traffic and the lack of accommodation, which comes from overcrowded places by

people

from the countryside who move to metropolitan

areas

to look for jobs, so the movement of

businesses

becomes useful to tackle

this

problem,

then

no more

people

will come to

cities

to look for jobs anymore.

Additionally

, if more and more cooperations arrive in the countryside, those places will get the most benefits

while

people

get jobs and the facilities of provinces will be improved,

then

residents's quality of life will be better.

On the other hand

, there will be some drawbacks that the government should consider. To urge companies or economic contributors to move to rural

areas

will not be an easy mission

while

in order to carry out it, authorities or governments will have to spend a lot of money to improve facilities, roads, and infrastructures to attract others to settle down.

Besides

this

process will need time to be done for years.

However

, to untangle the

problems

remaining in

cities

, they need a long-term plan in which the statement is suitable.

Although

improving facilities are quite expensive, it is a worthwhile investment for the future. In conclusion, in favour of moving

businesses

to rural

areas

would bring a lot of advantages, which practically solve the

problems

cities

in the long vision and

contributes

Correct subject-verb agreement

contribute

show examples

to a great economy for provinces less developed. In spite of some disadvantages

such

as costing quite high and so much time, it is still a great idea to try.

Submitted by nguyenhuyhoa1506 on Sat Apr 13 2024

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Consider introducing a counter-argument or a wider range of perspectives to deepen the analysis and show a more comprehensive understanding of the issue.

Balanced Argumentation

Your essay effectively outlines both advantages and disadvantages, showing a balanced view.

Supporting Examples

Good use of examples and reasoning to support your points, which strengthens your argument.

Essay Structure

The structure of your essay, with distinct introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, is clear and logical, aiding in reader comprehension.

Fully explain your ideas

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For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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10Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

6 paragraphs

348 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 8.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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TRAFFIC AND ACCOMMODATION PROBLEMS ARE INCREASING, AND THE GOVERNMENT SHOULD ENCOURAGE BUSINESS TO MOVE FROM CITIES TO RURAL AREAS. DO THE ADVANTAGES OUTWEIGH THE DISADVANTAGE?

Fully explain your ideas

Translation software are now accessible, people still thinks learning a language can be advantageous.

At present time the population of some countries includes a relatively large number of young adults, compared with the number of older people. Do the advantages of this situation outweigh the disadvantages?

Many governments in the world spend large amounts of money on art, which helps to improve the quality of people’s lives. However, governments should spend money on other things rather than art. Do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion.

Computer and AI technology are increasingly being used for online education. Can artificial intelligence ehance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development ?

In many counties, more and more people are staying at home to look after their children when women work full time. What are the reasons? Is it a positive or negative development?