IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The line hraph shows the Number of tourists visiting a Caribbean island (2010-2017)

#line #hraph #tourists #caribbean #island
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The given line graph illustrates information about the
number
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 of
people
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 coming to a specific Caribbean
island
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 over a seven-year period from 2010 to 2017.
Overall
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, what stands out from the chart is that the
number
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 of
visitors
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 both staying on
cruise
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 ships and staying on
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island
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the island
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 increased over the period given in question. Looking into detail,
people
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 staying on a
cruise
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ship
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 accounted for a quarter of a
million
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 in 2010
while
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 the
number
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 of
people
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preferred
Correct pronoun usage
who preferred
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 to stay on
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island
Add an article
the island
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 was approximately
three quarters
Add a hyphen
three-quarters
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 of a
million
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. Until 2011,
people
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 staying on the
island
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 remained stable.
However
Linking Words
, more
visitors
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 opted
for staying
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to stay
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 on a
cruise
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ship
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, at nearly half a
million
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. The figures for
visitors
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 staying on
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island
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the island
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 experienced an increase, eventually representing 1.5
million
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 in 2013. From 2015 to 2016 the
number
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 of
people
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 staying on the
island
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 and on a
cruise
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ship
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 was equal, accounting for just above 1.5
million
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. After 2016 the
number
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 of tourists staying on a
ship
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 experienced a much steeper increase compared to
visitors
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stayin
Correct your spelling
staying
 on the
island
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.
Submitted by Name_1234 on

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Structure
Consider including a brief conclusion to summarise your findings and observations succinctly, enhancing the overall clarity and completeness of your essay.
Language use
Try to use a varied range of sentence structures and vocabulary to demonstrate linguistic flexibility and precision.
Content
You accurately interpreted the data from the graph and provided a clear, overall trend in the introduction.
Structure
Your essay has a logical flow of information, moving smoothly from a general overview to specific details.
Language use
You effectively used comparative structures to highlight changes over time, which is key in describing trends.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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