Many university students live with their families,while others live away from home because their universities are in different places. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both situations?

#university #students #families #home #universities #places #situations

Correct pronoun usage

It a

show examples

fiction of students

stay

Wrong verb form

staying

show examples

with their families

during study

Change preposition

while studying

show examples

at university ,

their

Correct word choice

while their

show examples

opponents

who

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

live

another

Change preposition

in another

show examples

country or city

further

their own house.

This

matter has several advantages and disadvantages in both circumstances .I will explain

further

my reasons. On the one hand , if you have the opportunity to live with siblings or parents

during study

Change preposition

while studying

show examples

at university .One advantage was that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

many students like

home-cooked

Add an article

a home-cooked

show examples

meal,which can be

healtheir

Correct your spelling

healthy

.Another benefit

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

is that students do not need to do their tasks alone as parents or siblings help to

asks

Change the verb

ask

show examples

Also

if they live with family , they do not pay for

Correct article usage

the apartement

show examples

apartement

Correct your spelling

apartment

For example

, in my

friend

Change noun form

friend's

show examples

first semester when she was studying

Paris

Change preposition

in Paris

show examples

,she was too bored to wash the dishes every day and she

preffered

Correct your spelling

preferred

to order food which was unhealthy and she was spending a lot of money .

On the other hand

, living with your family members have many disadvantages .The major disadvantage of far living for the student

has

Verb problem

show examples

paid

Wrong verb form

paying

show examples

so much money for their life

accomidition

Correct your spelling

accommodation

without income.

Otherwise

living away from home can be more expensive

due to

,rent utilities ,and other expenses. In conclusion, from my

stand point

Correct your spelling

standpoint

show examples

,it's the duty of parents to provide better living opportunities .And if need to move to another place should buy a home at a rent and set a sharp eye on kids in order to make them more

seccessful

Correct your spelling

successful

Submitted by soglomovsarvar on Sun Apr 14 2024

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task response

Ensure you directly address both the advantages and disadvantages for each situation. While your essay attempts to do this, clearer and more distinct paragraphs for each would enhance understanding.

task achievement

Try to provide more specific, detailed examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and your points more compelling.

coherence and cohesion

Work on your essay's structure and organisation. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, introduced by a clear topic sentence.

coherence and cohesion

Be mindful of grammar and spelling to maintain the clarity of your arguments. Reviewing your work or using tools can help in identifying and correcting those mistakes.

task response

You have a good initial approach to addressing both sides of the argument, which is commendable.

task achievement

Your essay engages with the topic directly and tries to explore both advantages and disadvantages, showing an effort to fulfill the task requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

240 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Many university students live with their families,while others live away from home because their universities are in different places. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both situations?

Fully explain your ideas

In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?

It was predicted that, with the development of technology, people in the 21st century would have much more free time than in the past. To what extent has this prediction come true?

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