Many university students live with their families,while others live away from home because their universities are in different places. What are the advantages and disadvantages of both situations?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
A
Correct pronoun usage
It a
show examples
fiction of students
stay
Wrong verb form
staying
show examples
with their families
during study
Change preposition
while studying
show examples
at university ,
their
Correct word choice
while their
show examples
opponents
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
live
another
Change preposition
in another
show examples
country or city
further
their own house.
This
matter has several advantages and disadvantages in both circumstances .I will explain
further
my reasons. On the one hand , if you have the opportunity to live with siblings or parents
during study
Change preposition
while studying
show examples
at university .One advantage was that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
many students like
home-cooked
Add an article
a home-cooked
show examples
meal,which can be
healtheir
Correct your spelling
healthy
.Another benefit
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
is that students do not need to do their tasks alone as parents or siblings help to
asks
Change the verb
ask
show examples
.
Also
if they live with family , they do not pay for
Correct article usage
the apartement
show examples
apartement
Correct your spelling
apartment
.
For example
, in my
friend
Change noun form
friend's
show examples
first semester when she was studying
Paris
Change preposition
in Paris
show examples
,she was too bored to wash the dishes every day and she
preffered
Correct your spelling
preferred
to order food which was unhealthy and she was spending a lot of money .
On the other hand
, living with your family members have many disadvantages .The major disadvantage of far living for the student
has
Verb problem
is
show examples
paid
Wrong verb form
paying
show examples
so much money for their life
accomidition
Correct your spelling
accommodation
without income.
Otherwise
living away from home can be more expensive
due to
,rent utilities ,and other expenses. In conclusion, from my
stand point
Correct your spelling
standpoint
show examples
,it's the duty of parents to provide better living opportunities .And if need to move to another place should buy a home at a rent and set a sharp eye on kids in order to make them more
seccessful
Correct your spelling
successful
.
Submitted by soglomovsarvar on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure you directly address both the advantages and disadvantages for each situation. While your essay attempts to do this, clearer and more distinct paragraphs for each would enhance understanding.
task achievement
Try to provide more specific, detailed examples to support your arguments. This will make your essay more persuasive and your points more compelling.
coherence and cohesion
Work on your essay's structure and organisation. Each paragraph should focus on a single main idea, introduced by a clear topic sentence.
coherence and cohesion
Be mindful of grammar and spelling to maintain the clarity of your arguments. Reviewing your work or using tools can help in identifying and correcting those mistakes.
task response
You have a good initial approach to addressing both sides of the argument, which is commendable.
task achievement
Your essay engages with the topic directly and tries to explore both advantages and disadvantages, showing an effort to fulfill the task requirements.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: