IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Many university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others feel it is important to give all their time and attention to studying for their qualification. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

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In
this
Linking Words
 contemporary world , some
universities
Change the noun form
university
show examples
students
Use synonyms
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
want to learn additional
subject
Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
show examples
 to their main studies
while
Linking Words
 other argues that more time should
spend
Wrong verb form
be spent
show examples
 on studying for a qualification.
This
Linking Words
 essay will acknowledge the validity of
this
Linking Words
 statement and
elaborates
Correct subject-verb agreement
elaborate
show examples
 on my reason. On one hand, it is believed by
students
Use synonyms
 that learning optional subjects to their main course will give
ample
Correct pronoun usage
them ample
show examples
 knowledge about
other area
Change the wording
another area
other areas
show examples
 of the field .
In addition
Linking Words
 to that,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
basic information is needed in our daily life which makes it easy to learn and teach to others .
For example
Linking Words
 ,when you are doing
major
Correct article usage
a major
show examples
 in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
science ,
when
Rephrase
apply
show examples
 you
added
Wrong verb form
add
show examples
 English and Accounting which helps to improve communication skills ,
presentation
Correct word choice
and presentation
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 skills ,
where as
Correct your spelling
whereas
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 accounting gives basic accounting,
Correct word choice
and calculation
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calculation
Fix the agreement mistake
calculations
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 in our daily
life
Fix the agreement mistake
lives
show examples
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
significant
Add an article
a significant
show examples
 amount of time
spending
Change the form of the verb
spent
show examples
 on studying for qualification will make you expertise in that particular field . Science
students
Use synonyms
 spend enough time
on
Change preposition
apply
show examples
doing different kinds of experiments and learning formulas to
applied
Wrong verb form
apply
show examples
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
it
Correct pronoun usage
them
show examples
. More
over
Change preposition
apply
show examples
this
Linking Words
 will
makes
Change the verb form
make
show examples
 the
students
Use synonyms
 acquire more information
instead
Linking Words
 of focusing on
other subject
Change the wording
another subject
other subjects
show examples
. For
instances
Fix the agreement mistake
instance
show examples
,if a person
choose
Change the verb form
chooses
show examples
 accounting as
main
Add an article
the main
a main
show examples
 subject , he should focus on doing
Correct article usage
a bachelors
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bachelors
Change noun form
bachelor's
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 in Accounting and
Correct article usage
a Masters
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Masters
Fix the agreement mistake
Master
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 in accounting which enables them to become specialised in charted accounting.
To sum up
Linking Words
 , following the perusal of both views doing additional
course
Fix the agreement mistake
courses
show examples
 will help to acquire and explore
other field
Change the wording
another field
other fields
show examples
.It is
lucid
Correct word choice
clear
show examples
 that specialised in
single
Add an article
a single
show examples
 course will have better employment opportunities and growth.

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Introduction
Try to ensure a clear and structured introduction that presents the topic and your thesis statement more succinctly.
Sentence Variety
Focus on varying your sentence structures to add clarity and sophistication to your arguments.
Linking Words
For a higher score in coherence, make sure to use a wider range of linking words and phrases to smoothly transition between ideas.
Examples
To improve task response, elaborate your examples with more detail to clearly illustrate your points.
Conclusion
Work on creating a more concise and powerful conclusion that clearly summarizes your arguments and states your opinion more decisively.
Task Response
You did well to discuss both views as the task requested.
Examples
The essay includes a variety of examples which helps to support your points.
Content
Your essay shows a good attempt at discussing the topic from multiple perspectives.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Broaden
  • Perspectives
  • Specialize
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving skills
  • Career success
  • Interdisciplinary connections
  • Structured path
  • Clear goals
  • Creativity
  • Innovation
  • Academic credibility
  • Recognition
  • Balance
  • Exploring
What to do next:
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