IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 8.5

You are going to another country to study. You would like to do a part-time job while you’re studying, so you want to ask a friend who lives there for some help. Write a letter to this friend. In your letter: * give details of your study plan * explain why you want to get a part-time job * suggest how your friend could help you find a job

#country #study #job #you’re #friend #lives #help #plan
Dear Sandy, I hope
this
 letter finds you well. I am writing to give you some news and to ask for your help regarding my first part-time job. I have been selected to finish my major in Fine Arts at the University of Ottawa, so I will be moving to town next month!
Also
, I am already planning on doing a specialization in Editorial Botanic Illustration next year since I am really interested in their course. The reason why I am searching for a part-time job now is because I want to start improving my practical skills and earn some income.
In addition
, I want to know new people in the editorial field and start building my professional network.
Finally
, I would like to ask you if you could help by putting me in contact with anyone relevant from Seven Beauties Magazine, as you mentioned you have a few friends who work there.
Moreover
, I would really appreciate it if you could recommend me to them. I am truly grateful for any help you can give me and I look forward to receiving your reply. Yours sincerely, Amanda Lago
Submitted by amandacflago23 on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Try to make sure each paragraph focuses on a single idea to maintain clarity.
Task Response
Enhance task response by expanding on how the part-time job aligns with your career goals.
Structure
The letter is well-structured, with a clear introduction, body, and conclusion.
Task Achievement
You've effectively communicated your request and reason for writing to your friend, which shows a good understanding of task achievement.
Tone
Your tone is appropriate for writing to a friend, which makes the letter sound both polite and sincere.
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