The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.

#information #water #consumption #two #countries

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The graph illustrates worldwide

water

Use synonyms

expenditure in three departments between 1900 and 2000.

Linking Words

Also

Add a comma

Also,

show examples

the chart

similarly

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provides data about

water

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consumption but in different categories in

Congo

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and

Brazil

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in 2000.

Overall

Linking Words

Correct your spelling

show examples

is evident that the total

water

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consumption in

Agriculture

Correct article usage

the Agriculture

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, Industry and Domestic sectors experienced a significant increase over the

100 year

Add a hyphen

100-year

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period, with

with

Remove the redundancy

apply

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Agriculture purposes possessing the largest amount

while

Linking Words

Private users

having

Wrong verb form

had

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the lowest.

In addition

Linking Words

Brazil

Use synonyms

spent

Remove the article

apply

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substantially more

water

Use synonyms

overall

Linking Words

and per person than

Congo

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. Looking at the details, rising from around 500kg cubic meters in 1900 to about 1200 m3 in 1950,

water

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usage for

Agriculturals

Correct your spelling

agricultural

reasons

then

Linking Words

exponentially increased to reach 3000 m3 in 2000 .

Furhermore

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Furthermore

, The figures for

Indutries

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industries

and houses are relatively

simialar

Correct your spelling

similar

during the first 50 years, with both gradually rising from a mere 50 m3 to about 200 m3. After that, they witnessed a

considerabke

Correct your spelling

considerable

increase to around 1300 m3 and 500 m3 respectively.

On the other hand

Linking Words

Brazil

Use synonyms

used

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

much larger

water

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for every person than

Congo

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, with 359 m3 and

8m3

Correct your spelling

8 m3

respectively. It is noteworthy that

Brazil

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's population ( 176 million) and Area ( 26500 km2) both outnumber the

Congo

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, having 5.2 million people and

100km2

Correct article usage

a 100km2

show examples

land area.

Submitted by soroush.nezami on Sat Apr 20 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "overall".

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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.

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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, congo, brazil, m with synonyms.

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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.

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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.

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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.

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7
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
15
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

206 words

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The graph and table below give information about water use worldwide and water consumption in two different countries.

‏Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. ‏Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people believe the purpose of education should be helping the individual to become useful for society, while others believe it should help individuals to achieve their ambitions. Discuss both sides and give your opinion?

More and more wild animals are on the verge of extinction and others are on the endangered list. What are the reasons for this? What can be done to solve this problem?

spending money on the conservation of wildlife animals is a waste of resources. This money would be better spent on other more important things. Do you agree?