Some people think that all unviersity students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

In recent years many people
assume
Wrong verb form
have assumed
show examples
that we should study subjects that we are interested in. Is it
good
Correct word choice
better
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to study subjects
whatever
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
we like
than
Rephrase
rather than
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those which will be useful in the future? Some people believe
allowing
Change preposition
in allowing
show examples
students to learn practical
matter
Fix the agreement mistake
matters
show examples
for the upcoming days,
whereas
others believe
otherwise
.
However
, I strongly believe that the advantages of letting scholars
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
choose
the
Change the word
their
show examples
favorite
Change the spelling
favourite
show examples
subjects outweigh the drawbacks. It is argued that it gives an ease to develop university students' dreams pathway if they have
option
Change the article
the option
show examples
to choose their classes.
Firstly
, most of them will enjoy their time gaining
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
new knowledge they want to learn without having
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
pressure to do so, resulting
high
Change preposition
in high
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scores in their semester report.
Secondly
, by becoming proficient in what they have selected, they will
be
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
initiatively create new jobs in the current fields.
Thus
, is opportunity will not be found if there is
limitation
Add an article
a limitation
the limitation
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to the course choices,
according to
what
beneficial
Add a missing verb
is beneficial
show examples
in the future
although
the plus point is that it will be relevant to the recent career demand.
On the other hand
, freeing someone to acquire
understanding
Correct article usage
an understanding
show examples
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
what they like will lead them
in
Change preposition
to
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gaining satisfaction. First of all, no force in our
decion making
Correct your spelling
decision-making
actually
happen
Correct subject-verb agreement
happens
show examples
to be a turning point to a passionate
life
as an outcome.
Beside
Replace the word
Besides
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this
, individuals can structure things like educational
route
Fix the agreement mistake
routes
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to
be align
Change the verb form
be aligned
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with their
life
purpose.
Nonetheless
, attaining skills
that
is corresponding
Wrong verb form
correspond
show examples
with what is helpful in
time
Add an article
the time
show examples
ahead will bring a person a secured job, having financial benefits as a
consequent
Replace the word
consequence
show examples
.
To conclude
,
although
freedom in topic
chooshing
Correct your spelling
choosing
might bring an easy
life
journey
than
Correct your spelling
then
show examples
restricting
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
what appears to be useful in the future. It has more advantages, specifically in terms of proficiency and
life
purpose.
Submitted by paslonbahagia on

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grammar/spelling
Try to avoid common spelling mistakes (e.g., 'university', 'initiatively') to enhance clarity and accuracy.
content
Enhance your argument with more specific examples to strengthen your points and make your essay more persuasive.
sentence structure
Pay attention to sentence structure to improve readability. Use a variety of complex sentences to make your argument more sophisticated.
organization
Consider organizing your paragraphs more clearly, with each paragraph focusing on a single main idea, supported by examples or explanations.
conclusion
Refine your conclusion to more directly summarize your arguments and clearly state your personal stance with a compelling reason.
task response
You have articulated a clear personal opinion, aligning with the essay prompt’s requirement for an own opinion.
essay structure
Your essay structure includes both an introduction and a conclusion, adhering to the essential format of an academic essay.
argument exploration
You presented both sides of the argument, which shows an attempt to discuss the views comprehensively.

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