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Writing Samples
Band 7

The table shows data about underground railway systems in six major citites with date opened, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, making comparison where relevant.

The table shows data about underground railway systems in six major citites with date opened, kilometres of route and passenger numbers per year in millions Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, making comparison where relevant.
#data #railway #systems #six #citites #date #kilometres #route #passenger #numbers #year #millions #summarise #information #features #comparison
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The given table compares the features of
railway
Use synonyms
 networks, including opened date, length and the number of
passengers
Use synonyms
 in six cities.
Overall
Linking Words
, the three oldest systems, in London, Paris and Tokyo have longer routes and larger
passengers
Use synonyms
 per year than the three in Washington DC, Kyoto and Los Angeles The oldest and longest
railway
Use synonyms
 in six cities is London’s,
opened
Correct pronoun usage
which opened
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 in 1863, at 394
kilometers
Use synonyms
.
Railway
Use synonyms
 systems opened in Paris in 1900 and in Tokyo in 1927. Tokyo and Paris
are
Verb problem
have
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 the highest numbers of
passengers
Use synonyms
 per year, at 1,927 and 1,191 respectively. Their length of routes both less than 200
kilometers
Use synonyms
. It is noticeable that the
last
Linking Words
 two
railway
Use synonyms
 networks are Kyoto and Los Angeles. These two networks
also
Linking Words
 have the shortest routes, at 11 and 28
Use synonyms
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
 respectively, and are used by the smallest number of
passengers
Use synonyms
 annually, at 45 and 50 million respectively. Compared with mentioned above, the length of
Use synonyms
railway
Correct article usage
the railway
show examples
 in Washington DC is relatively long, at 126
Use synonyms
kilometers
Change the spelling
kilometres
show examples
 and has a relatively large yearly passenger
numbers
Correct the article-noun agreement
number
show examples
, at 144 million.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words railway, passengers, kilometers with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "compares" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • underground railway systems
  • date opened
  • kilometres of route
  • passenger numbers per year
  • summarise
  • main features
  • comparison
  • relevant
  • oldest
  • recent additions
  • route length
  • network
  • transport
  • massive
  • annually
  • comparatively shorter
  • follows closely behind
  • lowest number
  • second highest
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