Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

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These days,
people
consider education and
knowledge
of their
children
. One day, they will graduate
universities
Change preposition
from universities
show examples
and work by occupation. Some
people
believe that all levels of school teach theories,
do
Correct word choice
and do
show examples
not give chances to become experiences. I completely disagree with
this
idea and in
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will support my opinion with examples.
Firstly
, from primary to high schools responsible
children
Change noun form
children's
show examples
knowledge
and safety.
This
time is
golden
Correct article usage
a golden
show examples
years
Fix the agreement mistake
year
show examples
for
children
under
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
18
years
because everything is new and see first time.
For example
: If
children
interested
Add a missing verb
are interested
show examples
sharks
Change preposition
in sharks
show examples
, teachers wouldn’t allow
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
them to learn and feed
shark
Fix the agreement mistake
sharks
show examples
by
children
.
In other words
, schools teach
theory
Add an article
the theory
show examples
of science and math.
This
knowledge
is
Correct your spelling
in
show examples
basement
Correct article usage
the basement
show examples
does not matter who you become in the future. Another reason why I disagree with
do
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
not learning
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
practical skills is experiences are
a
Remove the article
knowledge
a piece of knowledge
show examples
knowledge
and
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
education. Practical skills like
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
habits. If you do two add two, you only
memorizes
Change the verb form
memorize
show examples
a result which is four. You do not understand how to do that. What’s more,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
learning facts is the most important thing. Many
people
already have studied, failed, learned and discovered,
then
teach
Wrong verb form
taught
show examples
you
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
their
knowledge
.
On the other hand
,
people
have spent many
years
until graduate
universities
Fix the agreement mistake
university
show examples
. They have studied and read for many
years
. But after graduation and
hired
Verb problem
getting
show examples
a job, some
people
have understood that they
do
Verb problem
are
show examples
not
interest
Replace the word
interested
show examples
their
Change preposition
in their
show examples
occupation.
As a result
, they lost important
years
of life. In conclusion, some
people
think many
years
are spend to study and
read
Wrong verb form
reading
show examples
, do not enough
times
Fix the agreement mistake
time
show examples
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
for
Change preposition
on
show examples
practices
Fix the agreement mistake
practice
show examples
. Personally, I think
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
knowledge
requires more time rather than to do it. learning facts are more important than experience.
Submitted by enkhbat0923 on

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Structure
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Coherence
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Examples
Clarify your arguments by elaborating on your examples; it will strengthen your points and make your stance clearer.
Accuracy
Proofread your essay to correct grammatical errors and improve clarity. Small inaccuracies can distract from the overall quality of your argument.
Thesis Statement
You have a clear thesis statement that sets the direction of your essay.
Conclusion
Your conclusion summarizes your viewpoint effectively, restating the main idea of your essay.

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • rote memorization
  • practical skills
  • adaptable skills
  • critical thinking
  • balanced approach
  • problem-solving
  • decision-making
  • workforce readiness
  • real-life challenges
  • technological advancements
  • information management
  • creativity hindrance
  • lifelong learning
  • skill development
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