After being punished, many criminals continue to commit crimes. Why do some people commit crimes even after having been punished? What measures can be taken to tackle this problem.

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There is a rising concern towards the fact that a large amount of caught and released outlaws still continue their illegal
activites
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activities
.
This
essay will examine the possible cause
for
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of
show examples
this
issue and try
giving
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to give
show examples
a solution. To start with, we must look into the fact that most of the crime happens in a nation or a state with economic disaster.
In other words
, low economy, poverty and high levels of inflation will cause low salaries and absurd prices on products which will
then
push the citizens into stealing to provide
themselves
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for themselves
show examples
or their families, even after being in jail.
For example
, Russian
civillians
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civilians
during the economic crisis of
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the 90s
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90s
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'90s
were in deep poverty and had to thieve in order to survive, the caught and released criminals had a choice of either
continue
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continuing
show examples
living in hellish conditions or
do
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doing
show examples
crime. To tackle
this
problem, the national government could do whatever reforms possible to raise its economy which will uplift the quality of life.
In other words
, fixing the
economical
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economic
show examples
issues will remove the
neccessity
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necessity
of burglary to survive and the released lawbreakers could reintegrate themselves back into
the
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apply
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society, now that they have working opportunities.
For example
, my father was a thug during
90s
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the 90s
show examples
, but after Russia
uplifted
Verb problem
lifted
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its economy, he stopped violating the law and found a stable job that provided him enough money. In conclusion,
thiefs
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thieves
show examples
commit
Correct pronoun usage
who commit
show examples
crimes after being punished are usually from countries with large
economical
Correct word choice
economic
show examples
issues and unless those issues are solved and the quality of life is uplifted, they will continue breaking regulations.
Submitted by akzharkynzhamal on

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Terminology Consistency
Ensure consistency in terminology to maintain formality and clarity. For instance, choose 'criminals' instead of alternating between 'outlaws', 'lawbreakers', and 'thugs'.
Linkage Enhancement
Work on enhancing the linkage between ideas and paragraphs with more sophisticated connective phrases. This will improve the flow and cohesion throughout the essay.
Evidence Variety
Try to support your arguments with a broader range of examples or evidence. While personal or historical examples are effective, adding data from reputable sources could strengthen your argument.
Task Response
You've effectively addressed the task, providing clear reasons for the continued criminal behavior and proposing viable solutions.
Structure Coherence
Your essay structure is coherent, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion that follow a logical progression.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • rehabilitation
  • reintegration
  • recidivism
  • underlying issues
  • support systems
  • criminal networks
  • peer pressure
  • barriers
  • psychological assessment
  • addiction treatment
  • economic factors
  • sentencing
  • data analysis
  • community-based programs
  • restorative justice
  • vocational training
  • social inequalities
  • preventive measures
  • post-release
  • crime cycle
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