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Writing Samples
Band 5

The chart below shows what anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course. The table shows the salaries of the anthropologist in work after five years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant

The chart below shows what anthropology graduates from one university did after finishing their undergraduate degree course. The table shows the salaries of the anthropologist in work after five years. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant
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The bar chart illustrates the activities that
was
Change the verb form
were
show examples
 done by anthropology bachelors after they had graduated from One University. Meanwhile, the table indicates how much money
earned
Add a missing verb
is earned
show examples
 by
anthropologist
Fix the agreement mistake
anthropologists
show examples
 who
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
Use synonyms
work
Change the verb form
worked
show examples
 for five or more years.
Overall
Linking Words
, most anthropology
fresh-graduates
Correct your spelling
fresh graduates
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 chose to have full-time
work
Use synonyms
 and only
few
Change the article
a few
show examples
 of them decided to have higher education
while
Linking Words
 doing part-time
work
Use synonyms
.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, after five years
working
Change preposition
of working
show examples
 experience, half of the
antropologists
Correct your spelling
anthropologists
anthropologist
 who
work
Use synonyms
 in
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 sector got
highest
Change the article
the highest
show examples
 salary. Looking into details, students who did full-time
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
 after they had graduated accounted for 52% of
total
Add an article
the total
show examples
. In the second place, 15% of them were likely to have part-time
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
, surpassing those who
unemployed
Add a missing verb
were unemployed
show examples
 which was recorded at 12%.
While
Linking Words
 8%
fresh
Change preposition
of fresh
show examples
 graduates chose to pursue higher education as much as those who were unknown. Grouping by salaries, the majority of 5-year-experienced anthropologists regardless
their
Change preposition
of their
show examples
workfield
Correct your spelling
work field
 could earn more than $100,000, especially in
government
Correct article usage
the government
show examples
 sector. Those who
work
Use synonyms
 in private
company
Replace the word
companies are
show examples
 more likely to
received
Change the form of the verb
receive
show examples
 $50,000-74,999.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Basic structure: Change the fourth paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words work with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 4 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
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