The given chart below illustrates the proportion of individuals of 4 kinds age groups who watched in movie theater in one national European between 2000 and 2011.

#proportion #individuals #kinds #age #groups #movie #theater #european

This

graph depicts 4 kinds age

groups

who watched in

movie

Add an article

a movie

the movie

show examples

theater

Change the spelling

theatre

show examples

in one national European, by the y-axis

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

shows the percentages of the 4 kinds age and the x-axis illustrate the change in

years

. By observing the graph it seems that the 15-24

group

was facing many changes during the

years

, and the

group

7-14,

Correct word choice

and 25

show examples

-35 seems more staple and closer to each other, they started with a different percentage and ended up with the same percentage, the

group

who include 35 and over did not face any

noticable

Correct your spelling

noticeable

notable

changes compared to the other

groups

but only in the

last

years

the

group

started to face

unsual

Correct your spelling

unusual

changes.

To conclude

, all of the three

groups

was having

Wrong verb form

had

show examples

an extreme amount of

changing

Replace the word

change

show examples

in the percentage

expect

Correct your spelling

except

show examples

the 35 and over

group

Add an article

the group

show examples

, it was more stable than the other

groups

but only in the

last

years

Add a comma

years,

show examples

the

percenrage

Correct your spelling

percentage

started

Replace the word

start

show examples

to increase.

Submitted by ahmed2024oudah on Sat Apr 27 2024

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words groups, years, group with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "change" was used 4 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.

▼

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3Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

154 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

proportion
individuals
age groups
watched in movie theater
national
European
between
2000
2011
describe
compare
attendance
changes
summarize
chart

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The given chart below illustrates the proportion of individuals of 4 kinds age groups who watched in movie theater in one national European between 2000 and 2011.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Some parents buy their kids a large number of toys to play with.What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having lot of toys.

Some people think that it’s a good idea to socialize with work colleagues during evenings and weekends. Other people think it’s important to keep working life completely separate from social life. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

It is often said that governments spend too much money on wild life protection, while others say that there are other problems that are more important? do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that strict punishments for driving offences are the key to reducing traffic accidents. Others, however, believe that other measures would be more effective in improving road safety. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+