IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

The apartment that you have rented was repaired recently. Later, you discovered some defects in repairs. Write a letter to your landlord. In your letter explain what the problem is suggest how it can be fixed say what you would like the landlord to do about it.

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Dear Sir, I am Ryan and I am writing to you about some problems that I have been facing even after repair is completed. As you know
that
Correct word choice
apply
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I rented
the
Correct article usage
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apartment number 78 in Delta
rise
Capitalize word
Rise
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 on December 1,2023. After
that
Add a comma
that,
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 I reported that some pipes are clogged and leakage issues under the sink of the kitchen and the bathroom. The plumber came
the
Correct article usage
apply
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last
Linking Words
 weekend and fixed the leakage
however
Linking Words
 the water flow is still slow and water drains very
slow
Change the word
slowly
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 through the pipes and
have
Change the verb form
has
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 caused trouble in the sinks and tubs. In order to resolve
this
Linking Words
 issue I request you to look into
this
Linking Words
 matter again. Probably, the pipeline has to be replaced to get rid of old lines and to
channelise
Verb problem
channel
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water
Correct article usage
the water
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. Specifically, the bathroom pipes need to be checked because they are slow in drainage. I hope you will look into
this
Linking Words
 matter again and will make an appointment with the plumber again so that he
could
Wrong verb form
can
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 solve the problem and provide an effective solution. We are facing a lot of daily issues
due to
Linking Words
such
Linking Words
 problems and it need a quick response. I will be available on the weekend to give access to the technician of the apartment. Please arrange a repair on
this
Linking Words
 weekend. I hope you will consider my request and help to resolve it. Yours faithfully, Ryan

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structure
Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and supports the overall message of your letter. The introduction sets the context well, but elaborating a bit more on each specific issue within its own paragraph could strengthen your argument.
cohesion
Using a range of sentence structures and cohesive devices (like linking words) enhances readability. You've done this quite well, but further variety could elevate your writing.
task response
To fully meet the task requirements, it's crucial to address all parts of the prompt. You've identified the problem, suggested a solution, and clearly stated what you would like the landlord to do, which aligns well with the prompt's instructions.
structure
The overall structure of the letter is clear and logical, facilitating easy understanding of your concerns and requests.
tone
The tone of the letter is suitably formal and polite, appropriate for correspondence with a landlord. This professionalism is commendable.
paragraph use
You've effectively used paragraphs to organize information, which helps in enhancing the coherence and cohesion of the letter.
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