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Writing Samples
Band 5

Many people prefer to stay in the same type of work all their life, whereas others prefer to change the type of work. Discuss both sides and state your own opinion.

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In today's world, individuals like to explore more professional
opitions
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options
opinions
.It is considered by some that changing
field
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 of
work
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 is better,
while
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 there are others who
thinks
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think
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 that choosing the same kind of
work
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 is more stable. In my opinion,
combination
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a combination
the combination
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 of the two is the best way forward. On
one
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 hand,
the
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they
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advocates
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advocate
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of
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apply
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the idea that
people
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 should stick to the same type of
work
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 throughout their
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life
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lives
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 because they can become experts in
one
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skill
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.
As it
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It
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 is better to be a master in
one
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skill
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 rather than
being
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be
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 involved in multiple
skills
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 at once without mastering none of these. Take
an
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the
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 example of Brazil, where most of the
people
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 try to learn the
skill
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 of farming because about 70% of the
people
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 are associated with
this
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field
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.
Thus
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, excelling in
one
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skill
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 is good for some
people
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.
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While
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On
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on the other hand
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, supporters of the idea that
people
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 should learn different
skills
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 and change their type of
work
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 to compete with the modern requirements of the progressing world. As we can advancements are being made in every
field
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 of
life
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 and to be in parallel pace with
this
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, a person has to be updated
according to
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 the need rather than being stuck with the same type of
work
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.
For example
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 in numerous underdeveloped countries like Nigeria,
people
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 are far behind the ones who have learned modern
skills
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.
Hence
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, trying new types of
work
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 is an important thing in
life
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.
However
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, I
also
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 believe that
one
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 should try to match the requirements of the world and learn new things
as well as
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 polish the existing
skills
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.
For instance
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, in my
field
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 of software engineering, we have to be updated with every new technology to stay in
the
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apply
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competition with the rapidly changing technology. In conclusion, various personals prefer to stay in
one
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 working domain whilst others tend to modify their initial jobs.
According to
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 my way of thinking, I believe that learning new
skills
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 and changing types of
work
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 in professional
life
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 leads to a sustainable lifestyle.

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Example Usage
Try to present more specific examples and detailed evidence to support your arguments, enhancing the persuasiveness of your essay.
Coherence
For coherence, ensure each paragraph smoothly transitions to the next with clear topic sentences and linking words.
Task Response
To strengthen task achievement, focus on fully addressing all parts of the prompt, including discussing both views comprehensively and justifying your opinion.
Introduction/Conclusion
Your introduction and conclusion are clear, effectively setting the stage for your discussion and summarizing your view.
Logical Structure
Good use of logical structure, with a clear progression from one idea to the next.
Balanced Discussion
You have a balanced discussion of both sides of the argument which shows an understanding of the topic.
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