Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

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Some

university

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students

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opt to mainly focus on studying for a qualification,

while

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others prefer to discover various

subjects

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apart from their main

subjects

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. Personally, I tend to learn about different

subjects

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besides

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major

subjects

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. Nowadays, many jobs require certain qualifications to prove that you have the relevant skills.

Therefore

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, a freshman with a qualification will be more easily to get a job after graduation.

However

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, it is important to find out what

Verb problem

apply

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your passion about before spending a lot of time on the test. If the industry does not meet the student's expectations

then

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those time were all wasted. Take accounting ,

for example

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, many

students

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majoring in accounting are prepared for an accountant qualification since their first year in

university

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But

Correct word choice

However

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they find out they do not like accounting at all after they

took

Wrong verb form

take

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an internship in the industry.

Hence

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, they need to search for a new way after getting a lot of qualifications.

While

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other

students

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not only give their time

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main

subjects

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but

also

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other

interested

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interesting

show examples

subjects

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. They have more chances to make mistakes.

Moreover

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, universities offer diverse courses and abundant resources to

students

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. The

university

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is like a comfort zone to

students

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, it is really useful for finding a life goal on the campus.

For instance

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besides

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my major which is business I

also

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take different classes in my

university

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such

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as architecture, engineering, and technology. By undertaking these diverse courses, I learned a basic knowledge of different industries. The most important thing is that

this

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knowledge opened my mind, and triggered me to understand more knowledge. In conclusion, I tend to discover

this

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world by learning various

subjects

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apart from the main

subjects

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. It brings a lot to my life.

yushin20020625Wed May 01 2024

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Sentence Variety

Work on integrating more varied and complex sentence structures to enhance the readability and sophistication of your essay.

Example Development

Consider developing your examples further to more effectively support your main points and add depth to your argument.

Balanced Argument

Maintain a balance between discussing both views and your own opinion to ensure a well-rounded response.

Structure

Your essay clearly introduces the topic, presents both sides of the argument, and includes a distinct conclusion, which shows good task response and structure.

Organization

You’ve effectively used paragraphs to organize your ideas, which aids coherence and cohesion throughout the essay.

Opinion Clarity

Your personal opinion is clear and well-supported, demonstrating good task achievement.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

288 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Broaden
Perspectives
Specialize
Critical thinking
Problem-solving skills
Career success
Interdisciplinary connections
Structured path
Clear goals
Creativity
Innovation
Academic credibility
Recognition
Balance
Exploring

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To whom it may concern,

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

That's no job positions are made specifically for men, and women are capable of any occupation. Do you agree or disagree?

Many people prefer to watch foreign films rather than locally produced films. Why could this be? Should governments give more financial support to local film industries?

Most modern families have both parents working and as a result children spend less time with their parents. What is the reason? What problems can this cause?

Space exploration is too expensive and money should be spent on more important things. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Scenario: You recently purchased a product that turned out to be faulty. Write a letter to the store manager, complaining about the issue and requesting a replacement or refund.