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Band 6.5

The table data shows the proportion of income adults and children spent on 4 common items in the United Kingdom in 2005.

The table data shows the proportion of income adults and children spent on 4 common items in the United Kingdom in 2005.
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The graph gives information about the proportion of income
adults
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 and
children
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 spent on common items in the United Kingdom namely
adults
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men
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women
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 and
children
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boys
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 girls in 1989 year.
Overall
Linking Words
 the proportion of income
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
show examples
 on common showed girls and
boys
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 Similar rising trends
whereas
Linking Words
 that of
adults
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 and
women
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 saw small with girls having the biggest.
According to
Linking Words
 the line graph that showed
adults
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 rising 25 % percentage of
food
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 .
Men
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 average
drop
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14
Change preposition
of 14
show examples
 %
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
food
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 .
Women
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 high 39 %percentage of
food
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 .
Children
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 saw
Correct article usage
a
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decline
Change preposition
of
show examples
10 %percentage of
food
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 .
Boys
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 fall 9 %proportion of
food
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 .
Use synonyms
Grils
Correct your spelling
Grills
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dramatic 11
%percentage
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 of
food
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 .
Adults
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 sharp
drop
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 5 %proportion of electronic equipment.
Men
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 lower 10 %
percentage
Correct article usage
the percentage
show examples
 of electronic equipment .
Women
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 very fall 1 %percentage of
electronicequipment
Correct your spelling
electronic equipment
.
Children
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significant
Change the word
significantly
show examples
 rising 23 %proportion of
electronicequipment
Correct your spelling
electronic equipment
.
Boys
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 dramatic 18 %percentage of electronic equipment .
Use synonyms
Grils
Correct your spelling
Girls
show examples
drop
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 5 %percentage of
electronicequipment
Correct your spelling
electronic equipment
.
Adults
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 lower
5
Correct article usage
the 5
show examples
%proportion of
music
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.
Men
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 saw
steady
Correct article usage
a steady
show examples
 5 %proportion of
music
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.
Women
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 saw
decline
Correct article usage
a decline
show examples
5
Change preposition
of 5
show examples
%percentage of
music
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.
Use synonyms
Children
Change noun form
Children's
show examples
hight
Correct your spelling
height
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rising
Wrong verb form
rose
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 39 %percentage of
music
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.
Boys
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 significant 38 %proportion of
music
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.
Grils
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 sharp rising 40 %percentage of
music
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 .
Adults
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 very lower 1 %proportion of
videos
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. There was a
drop
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Change preposition
in
show examples
Men
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 and
Women
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 of 2 % and 0.5% respectively of
videos
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.
Children
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 fall 12 %proportion of
videos
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.
Boys
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 average rising 18 %proportion of
videos
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.
Grils
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 steady rising 17
%proportion
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 of
videos
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.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 75%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words adults, children, men, women, boys, food, drop, %percentage, %proportion, grils, music, videos with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "showed" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 10 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 11 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "decline" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "drop" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fall" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "dramatic" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "significant" was used 2 times.
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