Some people say free time activities for children should be organized by parents. Others say that children should be free to choose what they do in their free time. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some individuals are of the opinion that
parents
should organise activities
for their children
's spare time
, while
some arguers think that youngsters have freedom
to choose what they want to do in their free Add an article
the freedom
time
. This
essay will discuss both these viewpoints and explain why I agree that free time
activities
should be managed by parents
.
On the one hand, allowing kids to do anything they want for their playtime could put their safety at a seriously
harm. Change the adverb
serious
For example
, if some children
decide to play outside without parents'supervision
, they might meet some strangers who may have bad thoughts about them, and they have no Correct your spelling
parents supervision
parent supervision
experients
to protect themselves. Fix the agreement mistake
experience
As a result
, they could be kidnapped or something worst
may happen. To prevent any Correct word choice
worse
potentuial
risks, Correct your spelling
potential
parents
should supervise what their youth do during their spare time
. Futhermore
, Correct your spelling
Furthermore
parents
understand clearly their children
's strong and weak sides. So they can manage teenagers' daily timeline in order to develop life skills for youngsters
On the other hand
, the argument is that youth ought to be allowed to pick their leisure activities
. Because kids can practice their favorite
sports and improve their performance Change the spelling
favourite
while
no one is pressuring them to do so when they have free time
. Furthermore
, allowing children
to select their own leisure activities
can greatly enhance their social skills.
In summary, opinions can differ amongst persons.On the other hand
, I think parents
who plan their leisure time
for their kids have a greater chance of seeing them flourish in life.Submitted by aitam.dothi on
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Grammar & Spelling
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Example Development
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Sentence Variety & Vocabulary
Consider varying your sentence structure and vocabulary to enhance the readability and sophistication of your essay.
Clarity of Opinion
Ensure clarity in expressing your opinion. It's good practice to reiterate your stance in the conclusion to leave a strong impression on the reader.
Structure
You have a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which aids in the coherence of your essay.
Task Response
Your essay discusses both views and provides a clear opinion, successfully meeting the task's requirements.
Use of Examples
You've made an effort to use examples, which is great for supporting your main points. Try to add more detail to these examples to enrich your argument.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.