Some people believe that allowing children to make their own choices on everyday matters (such as food, clothes, and entertainment) is likely to result in a society of individuals who only think about their own wishes. Other people believe that it is important for children to make decisions about matters that affect them. Discuss both views and give your own opinion

#people #children #choices #matters #food #clothes #entertainment #society #individuals #decisions

It is true that

children

face numerous choices on everyday matters

Change preposition

show examples

their own. Some people think that

this

phenomenon is much

effective

Correct quantifier usage

more effective

show examples

as far as they make decisions to become more independent, others argue that it is crucial for youngsters to consider

about

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apply

show examples

matters which can affect them.

On the other hand

, making decisions without prediction can be

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apply

show examples

harmful for young people. It is important to have

conversation

Fix the agreement mistake

conversations

show examples

and

discussion

Fix the agreement mistake

discussions

show examples

with our parents.

Moreover

children

can inspire knowledge from adults who have experienced

Correct pronoun usage

it so

show examples

far.

For instance

, kids might learn about how to manage their financial budget and what kind of food or clothes are useful.

In other words

, it can be effective education for individuals who are under 18.

On the other hand

, allowing

children

to make their own choices without

parent

Replace the word

parental

show examples

permission has its own advantages. It can be

significant

Add an article

a significant

show examples

opportunity to let

children

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apply

show examples

give admission before they welcome adulthood and even if they make mistakes, they are more likely to learn from their past. It is all about finding

balance

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a balance

the balance

show examples

between personal preference and situation. Leading kids to independence will not be difficult if they start regulation.

To sum up

, as far as I am concerned, it is a

matters

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matter

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of self-education and worth of money. I strongly agree that it is more beneficial for

children

aware

Add a missing verb

be aware

show examples

of entertainment, clothes and food.

Submitted by buyabuya201 on Thu May 02 2024

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Structure

Consider organizing your essay more clearly with distinct paragraphs for each view and your own opinion to enhance coherence.

Linking Words

Use a variety of linking words and phrases to better connect your ideas and paragraphs for improved cohesion.

Introduction & Conclusion

Add a clear introduction that outlines the essay's structure and a conclusion that summarizes your views to strengthen the overall presentation.

Examples and Details

Incorporate more specific examples and details to support your arguments for a stronger task response.

Balance of Discussion

Make sure to clearly present and discuss both views before presenting your own opinion to fully address the essay prompt.

Understanding Topic

Your essay shows an understanding of the topic and includes arguments for both sides, which is good for task achievement.

Language Use

You have attempted to use complex sentences and a range of vocabulary, which enriches your expression.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

229 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

Autonomy
Consequence-awareness
Self-centered
Informal decision-making education
Child development
Age-appropriate choices
Cognitive growth
Fostering independence
Parental guidance
Societal norms
Interpersonal consideration
Balance of freedom
Individualism versus collectivism
Experience-based learning

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Fully explain your ideas

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Some people believe that schoolchildren should do their class work individually. Other people believe that sometimes class work should be done in small groups. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Financial education should be a mandatory component of the school program. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

With the development of social media, more and more youngsters are being allowed unsupervised access to the Internet. What potential problems may this trend lead to? What solutions can you suggest to deal with it?

NOWADAYS many people complain that they have difficulites getting enough sleep. what problems can lack of sleep cause? what can be done about lack of sleep?

Aircraft have been increasingly used for transport fruit and vegetable to some country where such plants hardly grow or are out of season. Some people consider it a good idea, but some people oppose it. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+