IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three sectors across four countries in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of workers in three sectors across four countries in 1980 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The charts below show the percentage of workers in three
sector
Change to a plural noun
sectors
show examples
 across four
countries
Use synonyms
 for about 30 years from 1980 to 2010 In 1980,
Germany
Use synonyms
's agricultural
industry
Use synonyms
 accounted for only 0.5%, which was quite low in the year 1980 ,
Next,
Linking Words
the
industry
Use synonyms
 in
Germany
Use synonyms
 with the highest rate among
countries
Use synonyms
 is 60% and the agriculture sector with the highest rate of 70% is mentioned in China. In 2020, there will be huge changes in
countries
Use synonyms
such
Linking Words
 as
Germany
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, the USA, Japan and China. The most typical industries with very high percentages are
Germany
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, the USA and Japan with equivalent figures of 80%, 70% and 80% and
Germany
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 with the lowest
industry
Use synonyms
 in
this
Linking Words
 chart is 0.1% and it has a bit of a sharp increase in China. The service
industry
Use synonyms
 in other
countries
Use synonyms
 has a negligible decrease from 40% to 20%.

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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Basic structure: Change the second paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 90%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words countries, germany, industry with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "show" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the second paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • percentage
  • sector
  • distribution
  • dominance
  • decline
  • significant changes
  • employment
  • patterns
  • trends
  • global
  • compare
  • highlight
  • examine
  • identify
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