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Band 5.5

There is an increasing trend sround the world to have a small family rather than a large family. What are some of the advantages and disadvantages of having small families rather than a large family.

#trend #sround #world #families
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Traditions and customs are rapidly changing.
As a result
,
parents
 in many countries are now choosing to have less number of
children
 than in the past.
This
 essay will examine what are the main advantages and potential drawbacks from both
childrens'
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children's
show examples
 and
parents
'
persperctives
Correct your spelling
perspectives
perspective
, of having smaller
families
. The benefits of having only
one
 or two
children
 are obvious. On a very basic level, a smaller family means more money and more time together.
Whereas
parents
 with many
children
 tend to spend their days juggling school drop-offs, and
extra curricular
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extracurricular
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 activities,
not to mention
 work and
runnning
Correct your spelling
running
 a home. Those with only
one
 or two have far fewer demands on their time and wallets. From the child's point of view, if they are an only child or have just
one
 sibling, they will receive far more attention and
emotinal
Correct your spelling
emotional
 support than if they were competing with four or five siblings for that attention.
This
 can have
long term
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long-term
show examples
 benefits, not just for their
self esteem
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self-esteem
show examples
 but in their academic and professional lives too. Despite these positives, many people still consider a small family problematic. From the parent's point of view, there may be concern for their own welfare in old age. When they get older and start requiring physical assistance, there is a risk when a couple has no
children
 or only
one
 to take care of them. In my country,
such
 people often end up in
state owned
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state-owned
show examples
 aged care facilities, which can be impersonal and even isolating. Another concern some have with
one child
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one-child
show examples
families
 is that
parents
 are creating selfish
ego maniacs
Correct your spelling
egomaniacs
show examples
. Rather than
beneftting
Correct your spelling
benefiting
benefitting
 from
parents
' attention as mentioned above, these youngsters can be over-parented and potentially grow up spoiled and entitled. In conclusion,
although
families
 are getting smaller in general,
wheather
Correct your spelling
whether
this
 is a positive or not depends on the individual. Personally,
while
 I can acknowledge the potential problems, I feel that smaller
families
 are ultimately better off.
Submitted by hudibaiqbal on

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Language Use
Focus on developing more complex sentence structures and using a wider range of vocabulary to enrich the text.
Task Achievement
Ensure to balance the discussion of advantages and disadvantages by providing equal depth and detail.
Coherence and Cohesion
Consider introducing more explicit connections and transitions between ideas for smoother flow.
Structure
Effective use of introduction and conclusion, setting the stage for the discussion and wrapping up the argument cohesively.
Content Depth
Good integration of perspectives from both parents and children, providing a balanced view on the topic.
Clarity
Clear and logical structure throughout the essay, facilitating easy understanding.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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