Some people think that getting a degree from university is the best way to guarantee a good job, others believe that it would be byeee to go straight into work and get experience instead. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.

As far as the number of people
Correct pronoun usage
who think
show examples
think
Change the verb form
thinks
show examples
that; having a certificate helps them to get a
well paid
Add a hyphen
well-paid
show examples
job,
on the other
hand
Add the comma(s)
hand,
show examples
there are some
another
Replace the adjective
other
show examples
people
Correct pronoun usage
who thinks
show examples
thinks
Correct subject-verb agreement
think
show examples
having
experience
is better,
I`m agree
Change the verb form
I agree
show examples
with having
experience
.In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will explain
about
Change preposition
apply
show examples
both of
this matter
Fix the agreement mistake
these matters
show examples
and I`m
telling
Verb problem
giving
show examples
my opinion with some reasons.
todays Studying
Correct your spelling
Today studying
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
a
high level
Add a hyphen
high-level
show examples
university is a very important thing for everyone because everything is
geting
Correct your spelling
getting
going
towards a side
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
is really
profassioncy
Correct your spelling
professional
and is
nessesary
Correct your spelling
necessary
for
everyody
Correct your spelling
everybody
to
khnow
Correct your spelling
know
about
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things very better than
past
Change preposition
in past
show examples
.
for example
when we were younger
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
was very simple but
nowdays
Correct the word
nowadays
show examples
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
is really better and more modern like having
foods
Fix the agreement mistake
food
show examples
,
build
Wrong verb form
building
show examples
builiding
Correct your spelling
buildings
building
, new cars and
also
schools are improving so fast. So it`s good to have
knowlage
Correct your spelling
knowledge
about
every thing
Correct your spelling
everything
show examples
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
level and how we can use them.
However
Add a comma
However,
show examples
having
experience
is
more productiver
Change the word
more productive
show examples
than having a degree because when a person
learn
Correct subject-verb agreement
learns
show examples
how she or he can do a job in reality is more effective for him or his. And exactly their
vison
Correct your spelling
vision
show examples
changed
alot
Correct your spelling
a lot
and they can
hae
Correct your spelling
have
a
well paid
Add a hyphen
well-paid
show examples
job really
esear
Correct your spelling
easier
than the
persons
Replace the word
people
show examples
who have a degree
with out
Correct your spelling
without
show examples
experience
. So if a person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
experience
can be more
sucssesfull
Correct your spelling
successful
than a person
just
Correct pronoun usage
who just
show examples
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
a certificate.
For
this
reason
Add a comma
reason,
show examples
I`m not positive
with
Change preposition
about
show examples
having just a degree without any
experience
.
Submitted by TUTOO on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Specific Examples
Try to develop your main points with more detailed examples and explanations to strengthen your argument.
Essay Structure
Work on structuring your essay more effectively, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, to improve the clarity of your message.
Task Response
Focus on addressing all parts of the task, including discussing both views fully and providing a more detailed personal opinion.
Linking Words
Improve your coherence by linking ideas more clearly within and between paragraphs.
Position
You've taken a clear stance on the issue, which is good for presenting your argument.
Balance
You attempt to discuss both sides of the argument, which is required by the task.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: