The chart below shows the percentage of people born in and outside of Australia living in cities, and towns, and Ural areas in 1950 and 2010. Summurise the information by selecting and reporting the main features of the graph and make comparison where relevant.
The chart comprises the
people
born cities
, Change preposition
in cities
towns
and ruler
Replace the word
ruling
area's
of Change noun form
areas
Australia
and outside of Australia
in 1950 and 2010.
If we look at the date of 1950, In Australia
50% of people
were born in cities
, 30% in urban areas
and 20% in towns
. Whereas
in 2010, people
born in cities
of Correct article usage
the cities
Australia
was
slightly increased to 10%, Unnecessary verb
apply
unfortunately
the Add the comma(s)
unfortunately,
people
born in Correct quantifier usage
number of people
towns
& rural areas
were
drastically Verb problem
apply
fall
Wrong verb form
fell
down
half.
The Change preposition
by
people
born outside of Correct quantifier usage
number of people
Australia
in cities
was 60% in 1950 and raised to 80% by 2010.
Further
, the people
born in Correct quantifier usage
number of people
towns
does
not make Change the verb form
do
huge
difference Add an article
a huge
in
between 1950 and 2010.
Change preposition
apply
However
, there is a huge 35 % of
decrease Change preposition
apply
people
born in rural Change preposition
in people
areas
between years
1950 and 2010.
Correct article usage
the years
In
Change preposition
Overall
overall
, the percentage of people
born outside of Australia
particularly
in rural Add the comma(s)
, particularly
areas
seems moved to cities
in the gap of 60 years, whereas
inside Australia
does not have large
variance.Add an article
a large
Submitted by sivareddymarella6 on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "whereas".
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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: Change the first sentence in the introduction.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Use less body paragraphs.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, cities, towns, australia, areas with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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