You want to sell your bicycle. Your friend has told you that his cousin might like to buy it from you. Write a letter to your friend’s cousin. In your letter explain why you are selling the bicycle describe the bicycle and how much it will cost suggest a date when your friend’s cousin can come and see the bicycle

Dear Hajisuhaidi, I am writing
this
letter to inform you that I want to sell my
bicycle
. In recent
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
, I change my mind and I want to buy
motorbike
Correct article usage
a motorbike
show examples
that is
why I want to sell the
bicycle
to earn money to
buying
Change the form of the verb
buy
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a new motorbike in a
motorshop
Correct your spelling
motor shop
in
city
Add an article
the city
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is
Unnecessary verb
apply
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like Vespa
matic
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Matic
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2024.
This
bicycle
from
Change preposition
apply
show examples
when I was
junior
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in junior
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high school my parent
buy
Wrong verb form
bought
show examples
it for me to
cycling going
Wrong verb form
cycle
show examples
to school,the
bicycle
is strong and you can use
to
Correct your spelling
it
show examples
anywhere you want.
Besides
, the colour is blue
combine
Replace the word
combined
show examples
with pink and of course I want to sell my
bicycle
the
Change preposition
at the
show examples
price
around
Change preposition
of around
show examples
300 AUD Dollars. Because tomorrow is my day off
that is
why if you want to visit my home just tell me
from
Change preposition
by
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
Email and I would like to prepare the
bicycle
and of
course
Add a comma
course,
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I want to provide you
a
Add the preposition
with a
show examples
cup of coffee and snacks. and others. If you
interest
Add a missing verb
are interest
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come
Add the particle
to come
show examples
to my home I will say thank you very much and I wish you with your cousin
stay
Fix the infinitive
to stay
show examples
healthy and happy
everytime
Replace the word
every time
show examples
. Best regards, Ajiburrachman
Submitted by patricius.yohanes on

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Task Achievement
To improve task achievement, aim for more precise detailing around the bicycle's features and condition, as this will help the reader make a more informed decision.
Coherence & Cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, work on connecting ideas more smoothly between sentences and paragraphs. This can be enhanced by using a variety of linking words and clearer topic sentences.
Coherence & Cohesion
Try to maintain consistent reasoning throughout your letter to strengthen the logical flow of information.
Task Achievement
You've provided a clear reason for selling the bicycle and suggested a specific time for viewing, which is excellent for task achievement.
Coherence & Cohesion
The greeting and closing of your letter are well-executed, creating a polite and friendly tone.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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