The most important aim of science should be to improve people's lives. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
The goal of science is to lead a happy life. I totally agree with
this
view because it makes our lives more comfortable than Change preposition
in our
our
past.
Change the word
the
Firstly
, scientists are gradually trying to discover new things which are beneficial for humans. Recently, transportation system
Fix the agreement mistake
systems
is
more developed because of their innovation. Wrong verb form
have been
As a result
, people easily communicate with others. Additionally
, new technologies are revealed due to
science. For example
, some researchers conducted research and found that scientists are able to display computer
, mobile phones, Fix the agreement mistake
computers
internet
, social media and so on, which makes human Correct article usage
the internet
works more
easier than their ancient times. If anyone Fix the agreement mistake
work
use
these, they will find any unknown information within a second and they Change the verb form
uses
are
rely their every Unnecessary verb
apply
sectors
on Change to a singular noun
sector
this
.
On the other hand
, medicines are another important innovation. In the past mens
Correct your spelling
men
men's
means
suffer
Wrong verb form
suffered
manu
unknown diseases and they did not know remedies but nowadays researchers found many techniques and amends. Correct your spelling
many
For instance
, the USA doctors published some drugs, which protect human
body from cancer and AIDS. Add an article
the human
Moreover
, they are not stopped in
Change preposition
at
this
point. They are continuously trying for items. In addition
, Agriculture is another sector, where agriculturists are
developed new Verb problem
have
high yielding
varieties, which supply our food demand in Add a hyphen
high-yielding
whole
world and people Change the article
the whole
are
not suffer Verb problem
do
due to
Correct article usage
the shortage
shortage
of Fix the agreement mistake
shortages
their
Correct pronoun usage
apply
meal
. Fix the agreement mistake
meals
Although
lands
Fix the agreement mistake
land
are
gradually reducing, scientists show new objects, which increase our abilities.
In conclusion, modern science has some disadvantages but Correct subject-verb agreement
is
their
facilities Correct pronoun usage
its
gives
us more peace. If the government takes necessary steps for drawbacks, individuals have no Correct subject-verb agreement
give
complain
Replace the word
complaints
against
Change preposition
about
this
.Submitted by Aafuankazinatoshi on
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Organization
To improve clarity and coherence, focus on organizing your ideas more logically. Each paragraph should clearly focus on a single main idea with examples directly supporting that point.
Introduction & Conclusion
Enhance the introduction and conclusion to more directly address the prompt. The introduction could more explicitly state your position, and the conclusion should summarize your arguments more succinctly.
Language Use
Consider using a wider range of sentence structures and more precise vocabulary. This can make your arguments more compelling and your writing style more sophisticated.
Examples
Provide more detailed specific examples to strengthen your arguments. While general statements are good, detailed examples can more effectively demonstrate how science improves lives.
Task Response
You've clearly articulated a strong position in agreement with the statement that science aims to improve people's lives, which directly responds to the task.
Use of Examples
You've effectively used examples, such as advancements in technology, medicine, and agriculture, to support your arguments.
Engagement
Your enthusiasm for the topic comes through in your writing, adding a persuasive element to your essay.