The bar chart below describes some changes about the percentage of people were born in Australia and who were born outside Australia living in urban, rural and town between 1995 and 2010. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.
The bar charts illustrate the changes
about
the proportion of Change preposition
in
people
were
born inside and outside Correct pronoun usage
who were
Australia
living
in Correct word choice
and living
difeerent
Correct your spelling
different
place
from 1995 to 2010.
Fix the agreement mistake
places
Overall
it can be seen from the bar charts that the most of people
who born
inside and outside Add a missing verb
were born
Australia
chose to living
in Change the verb form
live
cities
in both two period
.
It is apparent that Change to a plural noun
periods
number
of Change the article
a number
the number
people
born in Australia
who chose to living
in Change the verb
live
cities
at
1995 Change preposition
in
is incrasing
to 60 Wrong verb form
increased
percentages
in 2010. Replace the word
per cent
However
, people
who living
in towns and rural areas Change the form of the verb
live
is
decreasing from 20 and 30 to 15 Correct subject-verb agreement
are
percentages
in 2010.
Replace the word
per cent
Additionally
, the number of people
born outside Australia
who chose to living
in Change the verb
live
cities
incresing
from 60 to 80 Correct your spelling
increasing
percentages
in 2010. Replace the word
per cent
Although
, Correct word choice
However
proportion
of towns and rural areas Add an article
the proportion
is decreasing
from 1995 to 2010 at 10 and 5 Wrong verb form
decreased
percentages
respectively.
Replace the word
per cent
To conclude
the trend of living in cities
is increasing in both type
of Fix the agreement mistake
types
people
but in trends of towns and rural areas is
Correct your spelling
it
decrease
in 2010.Wrong verb form
decreased
Submitted by kran0630482559 on
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Vocabulary: Replace the words people, australia, cities, percentages with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "changes" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "percentages" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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