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Band 5.5

The world of work is changing rapidly. Working conditions today are not the same as before and people no longer rely on taking one job for life. Discuss the possible causes for these changes and give your suggestions for how people should prepare for work in the future.

#world #work #conditions #people #job #life #changes #suggestions #future
Nowadays , it can be found that there is a tremendous change in the way of doing jobs as
compare
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compared
show examples
 to the past which
preview
Change the verb form
previews
show examples
 that
people
 prefer to get
employee
Add an article
an employee
show examples
 for more
then
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than
show examples
one
job
. In
this
 essay , I will discuss the reason behind
this
 and the possible measures that should be considered to work in future. To commence with , there
are
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is
show examples
plethora
Add an article
a plethora
show examples
 of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
reason
Fix the agreement mistake
reasons
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 for the sudden change in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
professional careers.
Firstly
,
due to
 increasing inflation, it is really becoming hard for the individual to carry out their daily expenses. Lots of
people
 prefer to work for more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
one
 company to earn
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
 amount of money for their survival.
For instance
, it is observed that the tax rates
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 been increased
due to
 which the daily requirements have become difficult for
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 to afford.
Secondly
,
job
 insecurity is the main reason .
Due to
great
Correct article usage
the great
show examples
 level of competition among the
people
 , lots of
people
 are suffering to be kicked off from
thier
Correct your spelling
their
job
 at any instant.
This
 is giving the initiation to the person to secure
atleast
Correct your spelling
at least
one
job
 in their hand by getting
hire
Change the form of the verb
hired
show examples
 for more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
one
 company.
Thirdly
 ,
high
Correct article usage
a high
show examples
 standard of living
also
 plays a vital role. In the
past
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past,
show examples
 it was found that
people
use
Wrong verb form
used
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 to live
simple
Add an article
a simple
show examples
 lifestyle with their families but presently
due to
 modern society,
Individual
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Individuals
show examples
 prefer to buy
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
expensive branded things that include
clother
Correct your spelling
clothes
,
gadgets
Correct word choice
and gadgets
show examples
, party with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
friends , spending
theie
Correct your spelling
their
 weekends with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
friends rather than the family that result to earn more money.
However
, the measures that can be taken in future include the saving which can be done by an
indivdual
Correct your spelling
individual
 to cope
up
Change preposition
apply
show examples
with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
inflation and prevent the
unneccessary
Correct your spelling
unnecessary
 spending of money
over
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on
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
things that cannot be used for
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
 longer term.
For example
, nowadays
people
 prefer to maintain their standards by buying
an
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
expensive gadgets which
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
 not so important for them in
the
Change the word
their
show examples
 later use. In
additon
Correct your spelling
addition
 to
this
,
person
Add an article
a person
the person
show examples
 should always ask for the security of their
job
 by signing
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
 contract with the employee over the terms and conditions that will
be benefited
Wrong verb form
benefit
show examples
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the worker and the hiring manager. In
conlusion
Correct your spelling
conclusion
,
due to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the developing world and higher competition
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
show examples
force
Change the form of the verb
forced
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
people
 to work for more
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
one
 organisation in
comparision
Correct your spelling
comparison
 to the past .
However
, standard lifestyle and commitments at the
jobplace
Correct your spelling
workplace
 can reduce the stress in working style in future.
Submitted by gp04101995 on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure to vary your sentence structures for a more engaging and complex written style. Aim to mix simple, compound, and complex sentences to better demonstrate your language skills.
Task Achievement
To enhance readability, pay attention to punctuation, especially the use of commas and periods. Correct punctuation can significantly clarify your ideas.
Task Achievement
Work on the precision of your vocabulary. While your overall meaning is clear, choosing more precise or varied vocabulary can make your argument stronger and more compelling.
General
Consider proofreading your work for minor typos and grammatical inconsistencies to maintain a high standard of written English.
Task Achievement
Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, discussing both the causes of changes in work conditions and suggestions for the future.
Coherence and Cohesion
You have structured your essay coherently with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, aiding the reader's understanding.
Task Achievement
The use of real or hypothetical examples to support your points is good practice and helps to make your arguments more convincing.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

You are not ready for IELTS Speaking, if you

  • Can’t speak smoothly without pauses.
  • Use simple words and lack vocabulary.
  • Feel nervous and anxious when speaking.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • technological integration
  • enhanced productivity
  • job requirements
  • globalization
  • the gig economy
  • freelance work
  • traditional employment models
  • work-life balance
  • lifelong learning
  • adaptability
  • soft skills
  • hard skills
  • transferable skills
  • networking
  • professional relationships
  • digital literacy
  • technological proficiency
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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