Some people believe that the violence shown in movies and video games has a damaging effect on society. While others believe that these don’t have an influence on people’s behaviour. What is your opinion?

#people #violence #movies #video #games #effect #society #don’t #influence #people’s #behaviour

Few Individuals argue that the

action

and violence shown In films and digital

games

have a negative impact on

people

On the other hand

, others think that

this

type of content does not affect their actions.

This

essay will discuss both the views

as well as

give my opinion in upcoming paragraphs. To commence with the former notion, Watching

action

scenes In movies or video

games

are effect negatively on every person's life. To explain,

While

playing brutal

games

or enjoying films there are a few inappropriate scenes which can result in mental trauma for consumers.

For example

, a survey conducted by The University Of Florida indicates that 70% of folks who enjoy playing violent

games

or viewing

action

pictures suffer from aggressive nature and mental trauma.

As a result

, avoid Grade A violence content on the Internet. Shifting towards the latter notion, a majority of

people

take

this

type of programmes for a pure entertainment purpose only and they never attach or connect towards graphics. To explicate, Individuals consume brutal content and they love It.

However

, they do not think much about watching It.

Moreover

people

watch or play violent computerized

game

Fix the agreement mistake

games

show examples

, and after that, they watch another movie the very next day.

For Instance

, a headline from The New York Times shows that 82% of the

people

do not know what they watched or played yesterday.

Hence

, It does not have any negative impact on their behaviour.

To conclude

although

consuming brutal programmes effects negatively on humans, yet It does not impact their nature. I believe that

people

have no issue with the

action

movies and the video

games

Submitted by birenp046 on Sat May 11 2024

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Clarity & Impact

Try to enhance the clarity of your arguments by avoiding repetitive phrases and improve sentence variation for greater impact.

Sentence Structure

Include more varied and complex sentence structures to demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.

Grammar Accuracy

Review subject-verb agreement and verb tense consistency to avoid minor grammatical errors.

Balanced Argument

You've well balanced the discussion of both viewpoints before giving your own opinion, which strengthens your argument.

Use of Examples

Good use of an example to support your argument, making it more convincing.

Structure

Your essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs for each viewpoint, and a conclusion.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

271 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

pervasiveness
contentious
desensitization
aggressive behavior
outlets
correlation
causality
predictors
parental guidance
societal norms
mediate
mitigate
sociocultural context
moderating

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Some people believe that the violence shown in movies and video games has a damaging effect on society. While others believe that these don’t have an influence on people’s behaviour. What is your opinion?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

The increasing homogeneity observed worldwide can be attributed to the standardization of education and the influence of international policy frameworks

Some people think it is harmful for people to watch advertisements, others think it improves our lives. Discuss both views and give your own.

Many people argue that restaurants should be required to disclose the nutritional information of the dishes they serve. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages? You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Write at least 250 words.

Nowadays, sport is becoming a business and more and more professionals and big companies are getting involved in sporting events. Do you think it is a positive development or negative development?