Today more and more people want things instantly (e.g.: goods, service, news) why is this? Is it a positive or negative development?
In recent years, people have tended to demand goods and necessities more rapidly.
This
writer believes the root reason for this
phenomenon is the survival instinct that lies in humans’ genes and the result of this
trend may adversely affect human development.
It should be acknowledged that the majority carve their demands instantly due to
satisfaction caused by hormones which are released in the brain. This
is because, in the past, ancient humans had to take the environment to their advantage to hunt prey and avoid predators. In order to do so, primitive humans had to observe the surroundings as quickly as possible, however
, after thousands of years, the relationship between time and survival has turned into a demand for instant things for satisfaction. As a result
, the rapidity of time utility has turned into a requirement in any business or service. For example
, the act of transferring entertainment information used to be in oral form then
evolved into news and books, and now has become short videos that stimulate the brain constantly.
Despite the convenience, this
essay believes shortening the length of business is harmful to human development. While
many argue that the world has become too busy, therefore
every business must also
improve its speed to cope with the faster pace of society. However
, providing unnecessary amounts of information and goods may overload the brain, making processing the given data inefficient and lower productivity. Moreover
, constantly stimulating the mind, and feeding it with enormous information can shorten the attention span which is the culprit of many disorders as well as
bad academic results in children. Take the Vietnamese education system for example
, the system used to contain moderate knowledge about common sense, but now it consists variety of professional sectors that only suit gifted students.
In conclusion, the reason why people need things in a relatively short time span is the genes that request needs and this
occurrence may bring negatives to humans. Henceforth, people need to be more patient and try to live at a slower rate.Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
task achievement
To improve your task achievement, ensure that your essay addresses all parts of the prompt completely. Your discussion about why people want things instantly and its impacts is well-established, but expanding on both positive and negative developments could enhance your response.
coherence cohesion
Utilize a wider range of linking devices and transitions to improve the flow of your essay further. This practice will strengthen your coherence and cohesion, making your argumentation smoother.
task achievement
Incorporating specific examples to support your points strengthens your argument. Try to include more varied and detailed examples relevant to your key points for a stronger impact and to vividly illustrate your ideas.
coherence cohesion
Your essay has a clear structure, with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion, which aids readability and coherence.
coherence cohesion
Your main points are supported and well-developed, showing a good understanding of the topic.
task achievement
You've maintained a good level of clarity in expressing your ideas throughout the essay, which is crucial for a high score in task achievement.
Your opinion
Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.
If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.
Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.
Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:
...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?
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