IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

You work at home and have a problem with a piece of equipment that you use for your job. Write a letter to the shop or company which supplied the equipment. In your letter ● describe the problem with the equipment ●explain how this problem is affecting your work ●say what you want the shop or company to do

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Dear Mr. Purnomo, I am writing
this
Linking Words
 letter to bring to your
intention
Correct your spelling
attention
show examples
 the problem I face in my home. The issues with my
laptop
Use synonyms
 keyboard
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due
Add a missing verb
are due
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 to some disfunctional
button
Fix the agreement mistake
buttons
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. so I find
difficult
Correct pronoun usage
it difficult
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 to open my file as can not type anything.
For
Change preposition
In
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 the past weeks, I bought
this
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laptop
Use synonyms
 from your shop. I had not found any mistake with
this
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laptop
Use synonyms
.
Like usually
Change preposition
Usually
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, I operate
this
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laptop
Use synonyms
 and continue to finish my job. The screen, keyboard, mouse, and speaker
was
Correct subject-verb agreement
were
show examples
 in good condition.
However
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, yesterday when I
type
Wrong verb form
typed
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in
Change preposition
into
show examples
Microsoft
Correct article usage
the Microsoft
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 Word application, I
find
Wrong verb form
found
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 out that
space
Correct article usage
the space
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, enter, and all of
number
Add an article
the number
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 buttons
is
Wrong verb form
were
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 out of order. I
really
Add a missing verb
was really
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 frustrated as these
button
Fix the agreement mistake
buttons
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is
Wrong verb form
were
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 crucial when I did my task. Given the circumstances, I would like your immediate intervention to resolve
such
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 as
give
Wrong verb form
giving
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 my money back. If it is not possible, please give me another
laptop
Use synonyms
 which has better
spesification
Correct your spelling
specification
specifications
 and all of
equipment
Add an article
the equipment
show examples
 has good function. I have attached some photos in
this
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 letter for you to take appropriate action to tackle
this
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 issue. A prompt reply will be highly appreciated. Thank you in advance Yours Faithfully Yohanes

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on a single idea to enhance clarity. For example, one paragraph for the problem description, one for the impact on your work, and one for the requested action.
task achievement
Minor grammatical errors exist, such as 'find' instead of 'found' and 'can not' instead of 'cannot'. These should be corrected to improve the overall writing quality.
coherence cohesion
The letter includes a polite greeting and closing, which contributes to the formality of the tone.
task achievement
The writer clearly states the problem, its impact on their work, and a proposed solution, which effectively covers all required points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • malfunctioning
  • error messages
  • troubleshooting
  • productivity
  • affecting
  • equipment
  • brand
  • model
  • repair
  • replacement
  • refund
  • delays
  • critical
  • impacting
  • user manual
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