Today more and more tourists are visiting places where conditions are difficult, such as the Sahara desert or the Antarctic. What are the benefits and disadvantages for tourist who visit such places?

Nowadays,
people
aim to discover
challanging
Correct your spelling
challenging
regions
instead
of ordinary
places
.
However
, in
this
report, I will go through the merits and demerits of that. Visiting
such
places
is exciting, interesting, educational, helpful, and economical;
as a consequence
, many humans prefer to go there.
However
, there are many advantages
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
visiting
such
places
. For
further
explaining, visiting these
places
is a useful way to discover a variety of cultures, and how
people
used to live.
Also
, a lot of posts on social media show that these
areas
are usually cheap or free, so they are accessible
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
either poor or rich
people
.
Additionally
, some tourists acknowledge that they feel more excited, joyful, happy, and interested in these
areas
because in these extraordinary
conditions
Add a comma
conditions,
show examples
they can face new experiences and see unique landscapes.
Also
, a lot of students admit that learning practically is easier than studying theoretically, so they prefer to go to these
places
and learn by trying and experiencing
instead
of concentrating on their lessons.
Although
the points mentioned above are influencing there are reverse points that hold equal influence. To illustrate that, these regions are dangerous, boring, and difficult to reach.
In other words
, these facilities are usually abandoned,
empety
Correct your spelling
empty
empathy
, and far away from the living
areas
, so going there is extremely risky.
In addition
, reports capture that adapting to these
areas
is difficult, and many
people
failed
Wrong verb form
fail
show examples
to adjust to the conditions there.
Besides
that, finding suitable transportation to reach these regions is extremely hard.
Also
, providing healthcare in these
areas
is limited. In conclusion, on the one hand, visiting
places
where conditions are difficult is fun, entertaining, and useful.
On the other hand
, there are some disadvantages
such
as the risks, boredom, and lack
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
transportation.
Submitted by haneenalnetaif on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While the essay provides a clear response to the prompt, the introduction can be more explicitly tied to the topic. Make sure the introduction and conclusion effectively frame the discussion, clearly stating the main points to be explored.
task achievement
The main points are generally clear but can benefit from further development. Adding more detailed and specific examples will enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. For instance, mentioning specific cultural practices or distinct landscapes encountered in deserts and Antarctica would enrich the essay.
coherence cohesion
It is important to ensure each paragraph develops the topic sentence with fully elaborated and connected supporting details. Try to avoid minor inaccuracies, such as misspellings or awkward expressions, to improve coherence and cohesion. For instance, when you say 'these facilities are usually abandoned,' it might be clearer to refer to 'these regions are often remote and uninhabited.'
coherence cohesion
Transitions between ideas and sections should be smoother. For example, use transition words like 'Moreover,' 'On the contrary,' or 'Furthermore' to better connect your ideas and guide the reader through your argument.
task achievement
The essay addresses both advantages and disadvantages thoroughly, showcasing a balanced view of the topic.
task achievement
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points discussed in the essay, providing a clear closing statement.
coherence cohesion
The essay is structured into clear paragraphs, each addressing a distinct point. This aids in the coherence of your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Ultimate Speaking practice for IELTS

Practice speaking step by step, answer real-life questions, and build your confidence. Start your free trial and improve your speaking skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • adventure
  • unique experiences
  • ecosystems
  • conservation efforts
  • economic benefits
  • environmental degradation
  • habitat destruction
  • safety risks
  • extreme weather conditions
  • navigation
  • high price tag
  • specialized equipment
  • influx
  • strain on local resources
What to do next:
Look at other essays:

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!