You have been studying in a foreign country for the last two years and your Visa is going to expire next june . You are going to take three months professional course . Write a letter to the embassy. In your letter Introduce yourself Explain your situation Request for extension of your Visa
Dear Sir or Madam
I am writing to ask for information about the
embassy
in your letter .I am studying at University foreign language .
I will finish my studies next year .After I working
Wrong verb form
worked
at
Change preposition
in
foreign
world ,because there Add an article
the foreign
is
various places and us others . Change the verb form
are
Futhermore
, I am Correct your spelling
Furthermore
mean
Correct word choice
ready
to
the Change preposition
at
embassy
ready
for work . Correct word choice
apply
Unfortunately
I am not Add a comma
Unfortunately,
go
Wrong verb form
going to
foreign
world Correct article usage
the foreign
at
Change preposition
apply
the
now but he is more Correct article usage
apply
problem
and various things .
Fix the agreement mistake
problems
Firstly
of all, I would like to know embassy
what Correct article usage
the embassy
do
you do because what kind of work can I do if I Unnecessary verb
apply
banned
Add a missing verb
am banned
.in
my opinion I can't go because my family situation Correct your spelling
In
doesnt
suit me.
Correct your spelling
doesn't
Secondly
I would be interested to know how much is Add a comma
Secondly,
embassy
remuneration because before I am
Wrong verb form
was
basic
not working at various places .Everyone says that a person is forced to do everything.
Change the word
basically
Lastly
I wonder how Add a comma
Lastly,
do
you do working foreign world and how Verb problem
apply
did
you react to itVerb problem
apply
?
I would appreciate it if you could send the details to my emails
I look forward to hearing from you !
Yours faithfully
Sohib OchilovChange the punctuation
.
Submitted by soglomovsarvar on
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coherence cohesion
Your letter lacks a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. Try to organize your thoughts in separate paragraphs.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph discusses only one main idea to maintain clarity.
task achievement
Your letter does not fully address the task prompt. Make sure to introduce yourself, explain your situation clearly, and directly request the extension of your visa.
task achievement
Your tone is generally appropriate, but it can be slightly more formal and professional.
coherence cohesion
Your greeting and closing are polite and appropriate for a formal letter.
The Greeting
Depending on the style and aim of the letter, you will need to adapt your greeting.
Always start an informal letter in the ways:
- Dear + name
- Hi / Hello + name
‘Dear...’ is more appropriate, so stick with this.
For a formal letter there are two options for the greeting:
- Use Dear Sir or Madam if you don’t know the name of the person you are writing to.
- Use Dear + surname if you do know their name, e.g. Dear Mr Smith or Dear Mrs Jones.
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