With a fast pace of morden life, more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals. Do you think the advantage outweigh the disadvantage?

#pace #morden #life #people #food #meals #advantage

In spite of technological advancement and the widespread modern

life's

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life

show examples

pattern, there has been an increasing number of

people

eating takeaway as their main

meals

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meal

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This

esssay

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essay

argues that the downsides of health issues and environmental problems outweigh the

benefit

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benefits

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of having

a enjoyable

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an enjoyable meal

enjoyable meals

show examples

meals

. It is essential to acknowledge the

most

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apply

show examples

disadvantage that more and more

people

will suffer from many stomach-related illnesses by eating frequently fast

food

In other words

junk

food

contain

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contains

show examples

the

Correct article usage

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immense

amount

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amounts

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of animal oil and

any

Correct quantifier usage

apply

show examples

other harmful chemical

substance

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substances

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which are used to improve the smell and taste of the

food

and attract the

customer's

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customers

customer

show examples

craves can cause many severe cancers

about

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show examples

stomach

Correct article usage

the stomach

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or nervous

systems

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system

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As a consequence

, the decline of public health will put a strain on

the

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apply

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national development and society's welfare, leading to

the

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show examples

inadequate workforce.

Taking

Wrong verb form

Take

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the USA as a pertinent example, where a third of

young

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the young

show examples

population craving

to eat

Verb problem

apply

show examples

junk

food

experience many

kind

Change to a plural noun

kinds

show examples

of diseases,

such

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

obesity and diabetes, motivating the highest proportion of

obesity

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obese

show examples

people

in the world. Another

disadvatageous

Correct your spelling

disadvantageous

factor considering is the seriousness of the environmental circumstance.

This

is because

pararrel

Correct your spelling

parallel

with the rising number of

people

eating

junk

food

, the amount of plastic from utilizing

for containing

Change preposition

to contain

show examples

fast

food

increased significantly

Change preposition

over

show examples

years

Correct article usage

the years

show examples

, causing the destruction of

ecosystematic

Correct your spelling

ecosystemic

eco-systematic

eco systematic

balance.

In addition

, the waste of fast

food

can

also

become another harmful chemical

pesticides

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pesticide

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for the earth and water,

although

it can help to

imrove

Correct your spelling

improve

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

agricultural productivity.

For

this

reason, the pollution by

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

junk

food

's trash

put

Wrong verb form

puts

show examples

Remove the article

apply

show examples

hard pressure on

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

environmental

protection's

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protection

show examples

organization

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organizations

show examples

and funding to address with.

Thus

, the more fast

food

comsumed

Correct your spelling

consumed

, the more polluted the ecosystem is. Some critics,

however

assumes

Change the verb form

assume

show examples

that they live to enjoy

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

delicious

food

like fast

food

without any global consideration, which is irrelevant to themselves. There is a belief that the ambition of eating

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

overwhelming

food

become

Change the verb form

becomes

show examples

their motivation and

junk

food

become

Wrong verb form

becomes

show examples

one of

thier

Correct your spelling

their

the

decisions.

This

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

may be true, but the human civilization which is

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

unity will eliminate those

people

who are indifferent to the problems that fast

food

brings about to the communities.

As a result

, they will be

get

Verb problem

apply

show examples

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

blames

Wrong verb form

blamed

show examples

and

citicism

Correct your spelling

criticised

show examples

from

Change preposition

show examples

many

people

with

Change preposition

for

show examples

their lack of contribution

Change preposition

show examples

considerate issues and

selfish

Replace the word

selfishness

show examples

to enjoy

Change preposition

apply

show examples

themselves. Taking all points into account, the possible benefits of enjoyable

meals

Change the verb form

are

show examples

outweighed by the drawbacks of the negative

healthy

Replace the word

health

show examples

and ecosystematic impacts.

Therefore

, it should have been demonstrated that it is non-beneficial to

having

Wrong verb form

have

show examples

fast

food

as a

pricipal

Correct your spelling

principal

meals

Fix the agreement mistake

meal

show examples

until

their

Correct pronoun usage

its

show examples

adverse effects were disappeared.

Submitted by Nghỉ hè vui vẻ cả nhà on Wed May 15 2024

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grammar vocabulary

Concentrate on reducing the frequency of grammatical errors and refining sentence structure. Although your arguments are strong, the clarity of your ideas can be improved by consistently using correct grammar and syntax.

grammar vocabulary

Try to use more varied vocabulary and sophisticated sentence structures. Enhancing your lexical resource will help convey your ideas more precisely and make your essay more engaging.

task achievement

It would be helpful to provide more detailed and varied examples to illustrate your points. This would strongly support your arguments and demonstrate a good command of the topic.

coherence cohesion

Ensure that each paragraph transitions smoothly to the next. Although your essay has a logical flow, occasionally the connection between ideas is not as clear as it could be. Using transitional words and phrases can help to better interlink your paragraphs.

task achievement

Your essay effectively addresses the prompt, providing clear arguments for why the disadvantages of fast food outweigh the advantages.

coherence cohesion

You have a strong introduction and conclusion that frame the essay well, making a clear statement of your position and summarizing your key points.

coherence cohesion

The main points in each paragraph are well-supported and logically structured. Your arguments are backed by relevant examples, such as the mention of health issues and environmental impacts.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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12Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
62Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

439 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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With a fast pace of morden life, more and more people are turning towards fast food for their main meals. Do you think the advantage outweigh the disadvantage?

Include an introduction and conclusion

Aircraft have been increasingly used to transport fruits and vegetables to some countries where such plants hardly grow or are out of season. Some people consider it a good trend, but some people oppose it. Discuss both the views and give your opinion.

Some people think that a sense of competition in children should be encouraged. Other believe that children who are taught to co-operate rather that compete become more useful adults. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Smoking is major cause of serious illnese and death throughout the world today. In the interest of public health, government should ban cigarettes and other tobacco products. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that it is best to accept bad situation, such as an unsatisfactory job or shortage of money. Others argue that it is better to try and improve such situations. Discuss bot these views and give your own opinion

Today, some young people say that their mobile phones are the most important thing they own. Do you think that the popularity of mobile phones is a good or bad thing?