Completing university education is thought by some to be the best way to get a good job. On the other hand, other people think that getting experience and developing soft skills is more important. Discuss both sides and give your opinion.
Some people believe that pursuing a university degree is considered to be at most an achievement to find a better job.
While
other people think that familiarising with soft skills and obtaining adequate experience is compulsory. I opt for obtaining competency and enhancing soft skills is beneficial. In the forthcoming paragraph, I shall explain my point of view.
Firstly
, the majority of the population always prioritizes going for a tertiary education before enrolling in a satisfactory dream job because everybody thinks that fellow human beings will not accept the fact that their children do not have a degree or a recognized qualification to be eligible to find a career. For instance
, recent research carried out by the National University of Singapore in 2023 found that 76% of students of the faculty of civil engineering suggests that having a tertiary qualification is prominent to get into a career.
Secondly
, the remaining population perceives that enhancing adequate non-technical expertise and obtaining an internship is better off to joining the work. For example
, although
this
set of adults may not have enough paper qualifications, they can do better in certain jobs where they can apply communication, problem-solving ability, leadership qualities, and entrepreneurship which cannot be taught by anybody in universities; because most of the time technical subjects are being prioritized other than non-technical parts.
In conclusion, though some humans deem that having a bachelor's degree helps to achieve their dream occupation, another group of human beings reckons that creating significant types of non-technical skills and gathering substantial amounts of practice is essential for an excellent career.Submitted by thanushan.kulathasan on
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task achievement
The essay addresses both perspectives on the topic and presents a clear opinion. However, the introduction could be more streamlined. For instance, phrases like 'a majority of the population' and 'remaining population' are vague. Be more precise with your language.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are clear, but sentence structure can sometimes be complex and difficult to follow. Simplify your sentences to improve readability.
coherence cohesion
Work on creating smoother transitions between paragraphs. This will help make your argument more coherent and easier to follow.
task achievement
The essay provides specific examples, such as the study by the National University of Singapore, which helps to illustrate your points effectively.
task achievement
You present a balanced view by acknowledging both sides of the argument before expressing your own opinion. This adds depth to your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.
Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+
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