Some people believe that to protect local culture, tourism should be banned in some areas whereas others think that change is inevitable and that banning tourism will have no benefits. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. Write at least 250 words.

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Certain individuals believe that local culture can be preserved by suspending international travel
however
others do not agree with the same idea. They think that it is not a solution
of
Change preposition
to
show examples
this
issue because nobody can hinder
tourism
Correct article usage
the tourism
show examples
industry from growing and expanding. In
this
essay, both opinions will be explored
further
to draw a conclusion. From my perspective, it is an impossible
maneuver
Change the spelling
manoeuvre
show examples
and
this
industry should be supported to contribute to
progress
Add an article
the progress
show examples
of its
area
.
To begin
with, exploration of an unchartered territory is a human nature which cannot be enforced by banning it to protect native traditions. Some countries depend on
this
sector to attract investors and arrange employment for their
people
. So, tourists and native
people
are intertwined to get
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
benefits from each other. To exemplify, Maldives is an island country where other natural resources are not enough to support their population.
However
, the natural scenery of
this
country
allure
Verb problem
entices
show examples
foreigners to explore the beaches and other picturesque locations.
Therefore
, they exploit
this
advantage to attract tourism to their country. Ergo, it is beneficial for both
people
.
In contrast
,
due to
the effect of foreign
visitors
Add a comma
visitors,
show examples
the local populace tends to change themselves to become more like them. They imitate clothing styles and even start speaking other languages.
This
is why some
people
worry about
fading
Correct article usage
the fading
show examples
away of old traditions
of
Change preposition
in
show examples
their
area
. To exemplify, tourist guides speak to the visitors in major languages of the world because the visitors cannot comprehend their mother language.
This
effect compounds and
people
forget their own traditional customs. In conclusion, exploration of an
area
is
inevitable
Add an article
the inevitable
an inevitable
show examples
venture and any curious traveller would never leave a chance to do so.
Besides
this
, native
people
of an
area
also
get benefitted
Wrong verb form
benefit
show examples
from
such
expeditions.
Thus
, travel cannot be stopped
although
certain measures should be implemented to save unique features of an
area
.
Submitted by Kiran on

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coherence cohesion
To elevate your essay, consider more explicit topic sentences for each paragraph to enhance clarity.
coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear, central idea supported by precise examples. This will strengthen your cohesion and coherence.
task achievement
In the task response, you could elaborate more on the measures to protect local culture while still supporting tourism. This would provide a more nuanced perspective.
task achievement
Try to incorporate more specific and varied examples to fully illustrate your points and enrich the essay's depth.
task achievement
Your introduction clearly outlines the issue and your viewpoint, setting a solid foundation for the essay.
task achievement
You have supported your main points with examples, which helps to clarify and reinforce your arguments.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a logical structure, and it is easy to follow the flow of your arguments from one paragraph to the next.
coherence cohesion
Your conclusion effectively summarizes the discussion and reiterates your viewpoint, providing a clear ending to the essay.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • influx of tourists
  • dilute local customs
  • commercialization
  • loss of native languages
  • economic benefits
  • revenue source
  • responsible tourism
  • cultural sensitivity
  • regulated tourist limits
  • cultural heritage
  • globalization
  • case study
  • ‘High Value, Low Impact’ tourism
  • controlled tourism
  • middle-ground solution
  • infrastructure development
  • significant revenue source
  • employment generation
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