Your workplace does not have a parking area for cars, and it is causing some problems. Write a letter to your manager and include the following: – Describe the problems it has caused. – Explain what benefits a parking area would bring to the company. – Suggest a solution.

#workplace #area #cars #manager #company

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Dear Mr. Sharma, I am writing

this

letter to draw your attention towards the problems faced by our employees

due to

not having a parking area for

cars

at our workplace. I would like to highlight some problems.

Firstly

office

workers have been parking their

cars

Change preposition

show examples

the parking area of the supermarket which is expensive.

Secondly

, it wastes a significant amount of time

Change preposition

for

show examples

our employees to park their

cars

there, leading to frustration among workers.

Lastly

, it is not safe to park

Change preposition

show examples

other areas.

Therefore

, our

office

should have its personal parking areas as it will bring some benefits to our

company

. It will not only

enhances

Correct subject-verb agreement

enhance

show examples

the reputation of our

company

but

also

saves

Correct subject-verb agreement

save

show examples

the crucial time of our employees.

Similarly

, our

company

can hire a security guard to collect parking ticket charges to park the

cars

in our

office

areas from the clients and

company

's workers which would increase the income of

company

Add an article

the company

a company

show examples

Similarly

, the security guard can take care of other belongings of the

office

too. I hope

these advice

Change the determiner

this advice

show examples

will be of some use. Thank you for your time. Yours sincerely, Amandeep Kaur

Submitted by immysandhu94 on Tue May 21 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your letter could be structured a bit more clearly with better transitions between points. Try using linking words or phrases to improve flow.

task achievement

To make your argument stronger, you could include some specific examples or data. For instance, mentioning how much time is wasted or an estimate of the increased income from parking charges.

task achievement

You have provided a clear and well-organized response to the prompt, addressing all the required points.

coherence cohesion

The greeting and closing of your letter are polite and appropriate.

task achievement

The tone of your letter is formal and suitable for a workplace communication with a manager.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

8 paragraphs

190 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

inconveniences
designated
punctuality
productivity
enhanced
potential
demonstrates
acquiring
vacant
arranging
agreement
implementing
shuttle service
encouraging
carpooling
incentives
subsidies

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Your workplace does not have a parking area for cars, and it is causing some problems. Write a letter to your manager and include the following: – Describe the problems it has caused. – Explain what benefits a parking area would bring to the company. – Suggest a solution.

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

People have diﬀerent views regarding the importance of a building’s function in comparison to its exterior appearance. In my opinion, I agree with the idea that a construction’s purpose should be more highly valued than the appearance for a number of reasons.

Some people say that in all levels of education, from primary schools to universities, too much time is spent on learning facts and not enough on learning practical skills. Do you agree or disagree?

Some people think that men and woman have different qualities, therefore certain jobs are suitable for men and others for women.To what extent do you agree or disagree ?

Many families move to different countries. Some people think children can benefit from this, while others consider it is hard for children if families move to a foreign country. Discuss both views and your opinion.